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Hi, I’m Dana Obleman, creator of the Sleep Sense Program. This week’s question comes from Pam and she writes, “How do I successfully wean Samuel? He is 16 months old and still nurses throughout the night?”
Well, as long as Samuel is a healthy 16-month-old with no weight issues, there is really no reason why he should be still nursing throughout the night. So there is probably one of two things going on here.
My first guess is that Samuel probably nurses himself to sleep at bedtime, so he therefore wakes up in the night and — instead of it really being a hunger issue, it is more of a strategy issue. It was the way he got himself to sleep in the first place. So every time he wakes up in the night, he is more than likely expecting you to come in and nurse him back to sleep. The food is a nice side benefit, but the real goal is nursing to sleep. So that is how he needs to keep doing it.
My first suggestion would be that you look at bedtime and you set up a routine. If you want to offer some nursing before bed, that is totally fine, but you have to make sure that Samuel stays awake through the nursing and poke him, talk to him, tickle him, whatever you need to do to keep him awake while he feeds. Then he goes into the crib awake and that is where you’ve got to start.
Another thing that might be happening is Samuel might fall asleep on his own at bedtime, but then still thinks he needs to nurse to sleep during the night. If that is the case, then you’re just going to have to pull the feeds “cold turkey.” The problem with just feeding once in the night is that YOU may understand that you’re just going to feed him once, but HE can’t understand that. He’ll just assume that if he stays awake long enough, maybe you’ll come in and feed him.
So for a baby 6 months or older, the best strategy is “cold turkey.” It is clearer to the baby, it is less confusing to the baby, and it resolves the problem a lot faster.
So those are the two areas you need to focus on, Pam. You can find some help with step-by-step plans in The Sleep Sense Program. Thanks for your question, and sleep well!
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