92 responses so far ↓

• 1 Sally // Aug 18, 2009 at 8:01 am

  i have 5 and a half month daughter. she wake up every night several times , sometimes just 1 or 2 hours after feeding, i have to put the dummy back for her, and she never sleep more than 6 hours a night. i feed her about 11pm and she must wake up 4am every night , sometimes i feed her at that time she seems doesn’t hungry, just eat about 80ml, how can i make her sleep longer and don’t wake up several times a night.

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• 2 stephanie hepple // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:15 am

  Corey is now a year old, does not have many bottles now through the day, perhaps 1 throughout. The problem is he can drink on average 3 bottles during the night. He cant be hungry but possibly associates the bottle with sleeping. Is he reliant on the bottle to sleep at night and it is a bad habit or could he actually be hungry? He is slightly overweight for his age, is this the result of too many night feeds as he does not overeat?

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• 3 Sian Saxon // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:16 am

  My 1 year old son’s sleeping habits are so inconsistent. Some nights he sleeps trough the night, other nights he can wake 4 times a night. I have tried to leave him to cry it out but he works himself into such a state that he can’t settle at all. Can you help?

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• 4 Sarah // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:20 am

  My 9-month old daughter has been sleeping well for a few months now. We have the bedtime routine all set and she’s asleep between seven and seven thirty, but lately she’s been waking between four and five a.m. This is NOT working for me! I’ll go in and rub her back for a minute, then leave, but she can’t seem to get herself back to sleep. She wakes in the night once or twice, but returns to sleep without any intervention from me or my husband. When she rouses in the early morning hours, sometimes I do change a very heavy diaper, but I wonder how to get her to sleep until a more reasonable hour?? I’m returning to work in September and hope to solve this before going back to work! Please help!

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• 5 Heather Crandall // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:27 am

  My daughter is 18 months and has started waking up in the middle of the night screaming and can’t be consoled. She yells no and pushes away from me. I have to lay her down on the floor until she finally begins to calm down. Why is she doing this?

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• 6 Joelle Smith // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:37 am

  My daughter is 15 months and has been co-sleeping (out of convenience only) since about 8 months. She slept in her pack’n'play right next to our bed from birth to 8 months and then converted into her crib for only about 1 week until she got a real bad cold and out of convenience, I brought her into bed with us and she has been there ever since. She will only fall asleep if I am laying down with her and she lies in the crevage of my arm. She will not have anything to do with the crib and wakes up continuously throughout the night either wanting her binky or she has to be touching mommy. If we even try to pick her up and put her in the pack’n'play or crib after she is asleep, she immediately wakes up and screams uncontrollably. I don’t believe in letting your baby cry it out. What can we do to convert our duaghter into her crib?

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• 7 Nadya // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:43 am

  Hello Dana,

  My husband and I are looking for your advice very desperately. Since our son was born (he is 25.5 months now), he never slept through the night, I breastfed him for almost 24 months, and now when it’s over, he is still trying to latch on, especially when going to bed. He wants me preferably to lie down with him, ideally he would just hug my neck or try to latch on but I keep saying to him tha he is BIg Boy now and that he needs to sleep on his own, so he does settled dow just hugging. He wakes up every 1.5 hours or even more often twisting and turning looking for me, so we take him in our bed till the morning. During the rest of the night he still trying to latch on. A month ago I had to go away for a 11 days and he managed the separation from the breast fine, slept hugging my husband. When I came back he didn’t rememebr about the breast till a few weeks later. What happened? Why is he regressing? He is also very resistant to taking naps. He wakes up around 6.30, takes nap sometime between 11 and 1.30 pm for 1 hour, and then finally goes to bed around 10pm, Bedtime is also a chaos in our hous, since Julian all of the sudden doesn’t like taking baths and wouldn’t go in his bedroom, unless both my husband and I are present there with him otherwise he starts chasing my spouse around the house all night long.
  Dana, please help, How can we make our son to sleep through the night in his own bed and go to bed volunteerily? Thank you so much for your time!

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• 8 Sara // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:45 am

  Ok well I noticed most of the questions you answer are for younger children (less than 9 months old) my son is 3! Please Help! He had to have an emergency surgery at 10 months old and after that I was too scared to put him in his crib all night in a different room so we began co-sleeping. We have somewhat broken the cycle by he puts himself to sleep in his own big boy bed around 8-8:30 pm but between 12-2 am he sneaks into our bed. How can we break this and still get some sleep for Mom and Dad?

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• 9 Jax (Jackie) // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:53 am

  Hi Dana,
  My little 4 month old girl has decided that she’s a little too big to be swaddled. I’ve tried loosely doing it but that seemed not to work as we both got hardly any sleep. She gets her arms out and then they flail all around. Is there a way to make her more comfortable and be able to sleep without the swaddle? Also, should I still try to swaddle her?
  Thank you
  Jackie

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• 10 Jessi Cook // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:55 am

  Hi Dana – thanks for your help. Jamison is sleeping well through the night and putting himself back to sleep when/if he wakes up. Most of the time he sleeps about 11 hrs at night; he is 13 months old and we still give him a bottle before bed. He has a great bedtime routine starting at about 6:30-7 with a bath. About 50% of the time he is awake when we put him down in his crib. My question is – how do you recommend we wean him from the bottle completely? We need to transition to a sippy cup (or regular cup) over time. I understand that we need to start this transition during the day too, but I’m anticipating that the nighttime bottle will be the hardest. Thanks for your insight! Jessi Cook

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• 11 Kate // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:59 am

  I was wondering when is a good time to stop feedings at night? My 5 month old wakes usually every night for a feed. I put her to be awake & she has learned to lull herself to sleep herself very well, but still wakes up & wants a bottle. She goes to sleep around 6:30 PM & usually wakes around 5 AM wanting a bottle. It is time for me to stop the feed?

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• 12 simonne // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:14 am

  Hi dana,

  Madison goes to bed around 7-7.30 every night and from there she sleeps till 11.30 13.30 and after that she wakes up every 3 hours or so. In two weeks she would be 6 months old, should be sleeping through the night at this age, and i cant get her back to bed without feeding her too, because there would be screaming till she gets the bottle what should i do

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• 13 Joy // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:16 am

  How do I get my 4 month old to quit “snacking” and eat a substantial amount? I rarely ever get him to eat for very long, and can never get him to take from both breasts.

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• 14 Brandi // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:21 am

  I have a 10 1/2 month old who still doesn’t sleep through the night. He came home from the hospital sleeping 12 -13 hrs a night without waking up. Somewhere around 7 months when he started learning to roll over, he’d wake up and cry because he couldn’t roll himself back over and go to sleep….it’s just gotten progressively worse. There are nights when he gets up 8 times in an 8-10 hour period. We’ve tried letting him cry himself to sleep, we’ve tried giving him a pacifier (he usually doesn’t want one), we’ve tried giving him a stuffed animal, a blanket…we don’t know what to do to get him to sleep through the night without waking so much.

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• 15 darkelle // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:45 am

  Hi Dana,
  I have a 9 year old that sleeps in my bedroom all the time. Lately when I try to put her to bed in her room she says she is scared and her heart actually feels like it is going to jump out of her body.
  please help
  D

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• 16 Rachel // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:45 am

  Grayson (3.5 months) has a good bedtime routine – it starts at 6.30pm with a bath, then a massage, story, feed, burp and off to bed while still awake. Sometimes he will squawk for a while but is alseep usually within 20 minutes. He wakes up for 1 feed in the night and sometimes wakes with wind during the night but is only fed at his 2-3am wake up. Our problem is daytime naps. He fights sleeping during the day – we have tried sitting with him, a dark quiet room etc. but only motion seems to lull him off during the day – a bumpy walk in the pram, a drive in the car or a walk in his front pack. How can I break him from this crutch as if I don’t succumb he ends up spending almost the whole day crying…

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• 17 kerryanne ford // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:49 am

  We’re 3 weeks into getting our 7 month old son to sleep independently and it’s working. He’s had a cough which has disturbed his sleep and he’s becoming more mobile and all his rolling over seems to make it difficult for him to settle himself. We nearly slip back into bad ways (rocking and holding) but so far, so good. He still feeds at 11pm and 3am and I wondering how to stop this. Will he just stop waking for night feeds as he becomes more accomplished at settling himself? and if so, how long shall I leave it? Or should Dad settle him instead of feeding? Which wake should we tackle first

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• 18 Samantha Page // Aug 18, 2009 at 11:58 am

  If I go in the room when Sadie wakes up but do not take her out of the crib she goes ballistic, would you recommend not going in at all? Then I feel awful for leaving her alone.

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• 19 Michelle // Aug 18, 2009 at 12:02 pm

  Great video and tips but this sounds just like my 26 day old daughter! I know she is going to wake every 2-3 hours to feed which is fine, but when she is nursing she falls right to sleep. I do EVERYTHING to keep her awake – a cold wipe doesn’t even work anymore. I take her off the breast and put her down and in ten minutes or so she will wake up ready to finish her feeding. It is a vicious cycle and since she is so young I really do not know how or what to do to get her on some sort of a schedule.
  A typical day for us runs like this:
  She will nurse and lull off to sleep- I tickle, poke, change diapers, use cold wipes, change clothes etc… to keep her awake. She nurses for maybe 10 minutes then enters the “milk coma”. I put her down and in about 10 minutes she wakes up wanting to nurse again. Same process continues until she finally sleeps for maybe an hour. This goes on all day!
  Around 6pm I give her a bath, nurse her then put her to bed. She will usually “power sleep” from 7-9pm, but after that it is all downhill. She is WIDE awake from 10pm – 3am or 4am. Same cycle begins as she gets fussy – she will nurse a few minutes, pass out, get put down then start all over again. We also try rocking etc… but I do not want to give her another habit to break in the future! I am beyond sleep deprived and not sure what I can do to get us on track. Please help! Thank you.

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• 20 Sabrina // Aug 18, 2009 at 12:12 pm

  Dana,
  I have purchased the Sleep Sense program, however my problem is not covered in the book.
  I have two boys, a 2 1/2 year old and a 10 month old, both good sleepers, however they keep waking up earlier and earlier. The older one I send to his room, show the clock and he stays playing until our regular wake up time, 8am. The little one wakes up with this movement in the house then it’s all over from there. If the 10 month old is the first one to wake up; before I have the chance to put him back to sleep the older one gets up and they start playing right away through the crib. We have a small house. They are currently waking a little before 7am and it happened slowly over a few weeks. FYI their bedtime is 7pm in the winter and 8pm in the summer, usually they sleep 12 hours every night and nap well during the day. The oldest one doesn’t wake up at all and the 10 month old nurses at once at 5am then goes back to sleep.

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• 21 Danielle // Aug 18, 2009 at 12:14 pm

  My son has seperation anxitey and night terrors at the same time and won’t sleep in his room. What can I do to ease his troubles?He is only two is it normal. I need help.

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• 22 Ronnie // Aug 18, 2009 at 12:23 pm

  The daycare my 3 year old attends allows them to take 2 1/2 hour naps so wheb bedtime comes at 8pm she is not sleepy at all. What can I do to get her to sleep at her normal bedtime instead of being up until 10pm when she finally gets sleepy again?

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• 23 Gina duran // Aug 18, 2009 at 12:40 pm

  My baby always has to be rocked to be put to sleep .. How can I teach him to put himself to sleep ?

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• 24 sandra vigneri // Aug 18, 2009 at 12:48 pm

  My 14 months old does not want to sleep in his crib.
  He sleeps in his baby car seat! He is quickly outgrowing it. I can tell he is uncomfortable after a couple of hours but still won’t sleep in his crib. He just had a hospital stay and it made it worse. He also wakes up every 2-3 hours and yes; I am making the mistake to feed him to sleep every time…

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• 25 vanessa glen // Aug 18, 2009 at 1:51 pm

  Dear Dana, I have a gorgeous, happy 5 1/2 month old boy who started sleeping through the night at about 2 months old, however, 6 weeks ago we had an extremely long trip back from a vacation and he has been waking up 4-5 times a night ever since. He has so much trouble falling asleep unaided, day or night–whereas he used to be able to fall asleep anywhere, anytime. Now I find the only way to get him off to sleep is by breast feeding him or rocking/bouncing him. He has a fairly good routine at bedtime apart from falling asleep at the breast. He only naps for around 20 minutes at a time during the day after much coercion and spends a lot of time being tired and grumpy, whereas he used to smile and gigle constantly . Do I have to let him cry to sleep if I put him down while he is awake (he naturally starts crying)? Do I leave him to cry when he wakes during the night or do I go to comfort him? I am so tired and I feel so helpless. I want my contented, well-rested baby back. Please help????

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• 26 Rosemary // Aug 18, 2009 at 2:03 pm

  Jala is nearly 3 – she has a terrible time getting to sleep at night
  she has a routine of bath, a drink, read a book and up to bed
  she tosses & turns and needs something for a minimum of an hour

  any suggestions

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• 27 Jennifer Tranter // Aug 18, 2009 at 2:11 pm

  What age is considered old enough for your child to “cry herself to sleep”? My daughter is 4mths is it mean to let her cry to sleep?

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• 28 Carrie Ann Haspell // Aug 18, 2009 at 2:20 pm

  My little boy is now 2 and 3 months and still wakes up to 3 times a night, he cries and cries until we give a bottle, he is then saturated by morning.
  We are not sure why he wakes in the first place, we want to start potty training but it will be impossible to have dry nights at this rate.help!

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• 29 Maria // Aug 18, 2009 at 2:35 pm

  Hello, I need help with my 3 month old baby. She sleeps ok at night, but my problem with her is sleeping during the day for naps. She sleeps for moments of 10 minutes and some times less. I notice too that she if very jumpy that is during the day and even is she is swaddle she still jumps like something did scare her and wakes up. Is this normal?

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• 30 Noeleen // Aug 18, 2009 at 3:11 pm

  Hi Dana. I have a 3 year old and an 18mth old. They both go to sleep sucking a bottle of juice and wake at least twice a night each for more! I know it is just a habit for both of them but I don’t know how to break the cycle. I havent had a complete nights sleep in 3 years so I would really appreciate some advice!

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• 31 EricaPetree // Aug 18, 2009 at 3:18 pm

  When is this ideal to start. I have a 1o wk old baby boy and he likes to nurse to sleep. He sleeps in his crib but we have never put him in there awake. typically my husband feeds him his last feed by bottle and then we put him on the breast for him to fall asleep. he will normally only feed for a few moments before falling asleep. we call me the closer. side note-my son has silent reflux. thanks for your time, Erica Petree

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• 32 Natalie // Aug 18, 2009 at 4:01 pm

  Hi Dana! I have a question about my 2 month old. How soon is too soon to start teaching my baby how to fall asleep on his own? And what are some things I can do now before I start this transition? Having a night time routine takes such a long time right now, when can I start this and what can I do now?

  Thank you!
  Natalie

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• 33 kelly // Aug 18, 2009 at 4:03 pm

  My daughter is 14 mnths and stil has a soother i have tried to take it away and let her go to bed on her own but she screems for 30 min then falls asleep for an hour then wakes again is there any easier way for her to get use to this or do i just keep going on letting her scream? my husband doesnt like to let her cry for very long he thinks she is not ready.

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• 34 Darcell Estes // Aug 18, 2009 at 4:24 pm

  My daughter is 3 and still wakes up at least 3 nights a week. Please help my husband and I get consecutive good nights sleep, and regain our sanity and husband and wife time.
  She doesn’t even go to bed until 11:30 p.m. or later. She doesn’t nap anymore.
  She has more energy than the both of us combined.
  My husband works during the day, and I work 3 nights and saturday mornings. He will wait for me to come home, and he goes to bed while I am putting her to bed. I don’t get home until 10:30-11:00 p.m. I have my faults too, by not realizing that it is so late, and that I have to lay on the bed next to her until she falls asleep.
  I would like her to go to bed at 8:00 p.m., even more so now since she starts preschool in
  2 1/2 weeks.
  I would like to be able to come home from work and go to bed or even talk to my husband about our days.
  We love ‘R’ so much, but we need her to go to bed.
  Thanks for any help.

  de

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• 35 Ranya // Aug 18, 2009 at 4:37 pm

  My daughter is nearlly 8 months old, and she has a good bed time routine. She sleeps independantly and can sleep sometimes for 6 hours at a time, but sometimes she wakes up two or three times a night. When she wakes she does feed well so i do feel she is hungrey. Is she really hungry? Sometimes if she wakes i leave her to cry and she will for maybe 2 – 3 minutes then fall back to sleep. So when she wakes and doesnt go back to sleep after 5 minutes i feed her. Should i leave her longer to cry and get back to sleep or is she really hungry? I cant wait for her to sleep through the night. Please help me!!!

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• 36 Katy // Aug 18, 2009 at 4:51 pm

  Hi, I have a 3yr old and 3 mnth old. We find it hard to get the older one to bed, after a good bedtime routine, as he has monsters in his bedroom and uses stalling tactics. We have tried everything we can think of, some nights he falls straight to sleep and others it can take up to 2 hours. There is no pattern to it. Then most nights he usually ends up in our bed. He doesn’t sleep during the day much anymore, but if he does, it doesn’t seem to affect bedtime. I would like him to have a regular day sleep still if possible.
  Also for the baby, he catnaps and sleeps very lightly through the day, and as he has reflux he won’t settle in the evening, so I end up feeding him to sleep, but everytime we put him down he wakes screaming within about 10 minutes. We have tried leaving him for a little while to cry and see if he settles, but he gets so wound up and so do we! He finally goes into a deep sleep after 9pm and we can then put him in his bed, but wakes 2-3 times through the night to feed. I am getting so tired I am falling asleep feeding him and waking a couple hours later when he wakes for his next feed with him in bed with us, with a sore neck and back, and usually the bed is wet around him (and me) from all the spilling.
  I desperately need them both to sleep through, is the baby old enough yet, especially as he was born fairly small and is only just 5kg now. They were both born underweight and I was told I needed to wake and feed them 3hrly as they needed to gain weight from more regular feeds. We got into a bad habit with the older one with that, so he never learnt to sleep through properly, we don’t want it again. The baby still feeds 3hrly night and day, sometimes more regularly, and doesn’t seem to be snacking, feeds really well.
  Have tried the cry techniques and hate that.
  Thanks for your time.

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• 37 amarilis // Aug 18, 2009 at 5:06 pm

  Hi dana tnks 4 u help. I have 7 month littergirl before she go 2 bed @ 7pm 2 ,7 am now she go 2 bed @ 8:30pm 2 ,7am she take her nop very well.but she star weking up n mid nite cry n I guess 4 sonting 2 eat I let her cry but @ the same time I give her hug n kiss like tha she know I m nex 2 her.I m working mother. What u sugesting..

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• 38 justine // Aug 18, 2009 at 5:15 pm

  MY 11 MNTH OLD BABY HAS 2 SLEEPS DURING THE DAY. SHE WILL OFTEN ONLY SLEEP FOR ABOUT 45-1 HR AND WAKES UP GRUMPY. SHOULD I BE TRYING TO GET HER TO SLEEP LONGER? SHE GETS HERSELF TO SLEEP ON HER OWN IN THE COT.

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• 39 Rhiannon // Aug 18, 2009 at 5:30 pm

  My daughter is 11 weeks she goes to bed at night at 7pm then i dreamfeed her around 10pm then she wakes anywhere from 1.30-4am dependng on how much she drank at dreamfeed then she wakes between 6am -7am this routine at night is pretty good so far i know it can et better… but her day time she is all over the place i knwo she shuld e awake between 1.5-2hrs now but she is so tired yawning grumbly after an hour or so, but then when she goes to bed she sef settles btu then wakes anywhere between 30 mins and 55 mins later and she cant resettle i hav left her thiking if she can settle the first time she can resttle but then i eventually get her up feed play and do her routine again how to get her to sleep longer during the day i would assume if she sleeps better durng the day her nite sleeps will get better too. Should i be keeping her up longer… Also what are some good cues for her to know it is sleep time during the day ? Should i wrap her up then put her to bed awake ? What other cues are there?

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• 40 Adele Fisk // Aug 18, 2009 at 5:56 pm

  Sleep…what is that! I had little Raiah in October 2007 and ever since it has been a constant battle. I have recently weaned her off her bottle but her need to see where Mum and Dad are continues. Her sleep patterns got so bad when she got sick, I really thought I was going to go crazy it was like torture lying there waiting to get worken again – at least 10 times. I have tried the tough love, soothing all with continuity but my little girl seems to have her own agenda. My one success came with melatonin. I give her a little before bed and she slept through two nights in a row on holiday when we were all in the same room. Back at home she has stopped waking at 11.30pm (bedtime is 7PM) but now wakes at 2:30am. My question is how do I train her to feel secure enough to sleep through this time until 5:30am when it is time to get up. She gets upset that we are not there. Many thanks, Adele.

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• 41 Tamara // Aug 18, 2009 at 6:07 pm

  I have been following your weekly blog for about 18 months now when I was having trouble with my oldest son’s sleep. He is 3.5yrs now and sleeps perfectly each and every night. Now I am having trouble with my 19 mth old. He has a great bedtime routine which is consistent every night and goes to bed at 6pm (he wakes around 5am, as this fits our family routine). He used to sleep through and have no trouble falling asleep on his own. He now sleeps in a bed though and keeps getting up to come out of his room – around 10 times. I ignore him completely when he does this and just put him back and close the door, but he is very persistent. I have found that giving him milk is the only way he will stay in his bed and then go to sleep. I know this is wrong, but I don’t know how to fix it. At night, he wakes now sometimes 4 or 5 times!!!! He is far too old for this and it is driving me mad as I know what the right thing to do is but he keeps changing and I feel like a failure. Please help me get him back to sleeping through the night…

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• 42 Bonnie // Aug 18, 2009 at 6:30 pm

  Hi Dana,
  I have a 9 month old daughter and my question is simply- how do you identify a feeding issue versus a sleep issue?
  My daughter’s sleep patterns are inconsistent. We have the same routine every night at the same time, and sometimes she sleeps, and other times she wakes.
  As I read through the questions, this seems a common thread.
  Is it to be expected for a baby to sleep all night long for it’s entire life? Or is it to be expected that vacations, sickness, seperation anxiety, teething, growth spurts and developmental milestones will interfere with sleep off and on?
  Just trying to determine if my expectations are too high for a 9 month old to sleep every night all night long, regardless of what’s going on in her world.
  (my eldest daughter was a horrible sleeper, and nothing I did seemed to matter. Magically at 18 months she started to sleep-after reaching all milestones, and teeth, etc)

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• 43 Naomi // Aug 18, 2009 at 8:00 pm

  Hi Dana,

  My son is 6 and a half months old he is having at least 3 solid meals a day and wont take formula at all through the day until his night feed. I bath him at 6.30 pm and give him a light massage then give him a bottle and he is awake when he goes to bed. He is always in bed by 7.30pm and goes down awake and pretty much talks himself to sleep. But he is still waking at night for 2 bottle feeds 1 around 10.30-11.30 and the other around 2-3am. I have tried settling him in otherways when he wakes even offer a soother but he screams until he gets his bottle in which he sometimes only drinks 50ml. He then wakes around 5.30am and wants to get out of bed. I dont mind getting up at this time but im starting to get worn out with the night feeding should he still be feeding 2 times a night? What is the best way to cut the feeds out? Also I find it hard listening to him cry but I really need to know of something to try now

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• 44 Kareen // Aug 18, 2009 at 8:13 pm

  Hi Dana,
  I have a 3 1/2 yr old and 3 month old girls who share a room together. The bedtime routine goes perfectly since my husband and I work together for bath, book and song (bottle for 3 month old). However, I have a hard time with middle of the night wakings and early mornings which wake up the 3 yr old. she gets upset if i take the baby out of the room and she stays alone and ends up waking up way too early and is very cranky throughout the day. Another problem is that the 3 month old wakes up for her pacifier constantly during the night and cant go to sleep without it. She does not feed at night anymore but does require that pacifier. what should we do? we both work and are totally exhausted…please help.

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• 45 Marci // Aug 18, 2009 at 8:15 pm

  Does anyone have any tips on how to wean baby off of the breast. My two year old daughter refuses to drink any other milk but breast milk and also has the feeding association thing going on around bedtime. I desperately need some help both me and my hubby are going insane!!!!

  I’m concerned that the technique that you have used in the blog might not work for her because of of her age.

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• 46 melissa // Aug 18, 2009 at 8:54 pm

  HI, i have a one year old girl. I rock her to sleep. I want to let her fall asleep on her own, but i have some insecurities. At night she doesn’t eat her full bottle outside of the bedroom. We rock her as she drinks, but she doesn’t drink her bottle all at once. Once she has had 8 ounces and i think she is done and should be full after her dinner and all that milk. I can rock and rock her and she doesn’t fall asleep until she gets a bit more milk or falls asleep and wakes as she goes into the crib. I could do rock her for 1 hours and she will not sleep or stay asleep. I know she does not need all that milk to sleep, but i think she needs to have some. So, how can i get her to drink more milk outside the room so i don’t have to let her fall asleep without a bottle, or with a bottle in the crib.
  Thank you,
  Melissa

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• 47 paula // Aug 18, 2009 at 9:00 pm

  My daughter is nearly 8 months old, doesnt have a soother, doesnt get rocked or cuddled to sleep and she doesnt get milk feeds at night anymore- she totally self soothes to sleep for all naps and night time sleep.
  The problem is she still wakes up crying once or twice a night. I usually offer water and a cuddle as she is very upset. She usually takes only 10-15 mins then is put back in her cot to go back to sleep. Do you have any ideas why she is still waking at night??

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• 48 katrina // Aug 18, 2009 at 9:07 pm

  hi dana having trouble getting my eight week old baby to sleep of a night she was sleeping ok for a few nights she would go to sleep at eight and not wake up till 4 in the morning for a feed now i have trouble geeting her to bed by ten at night i have to rock her in my arms then when i go to put her down she stirs again n have to do the same thing also having trouble getting her to sleep during the day can you help please

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• 49 Mandy Zimmerman // Aug 18, 2009 at 9:13 pm

  I have a 20 month old that relies on me lying in his toddler bed with him to go to sleep. I am willing to try the whole sitting in a chair and gradually moving it farther away each night, but my question is– how do I keep him in the bed if I’m not there to hold him in it? Most nights he so active that he wants to crawl out and go play with something. I have to hold onto him or sing or something to keep him in the bed. I know he is tired, but he fights it. I welcome any advice because I have to get up during the night to help get him back to sleep. Thanks!

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• 50 Roger // Aug 18, 2009 at 9:30 pm

  My daughter will be 7 soon. Her mother has primary care. I get her every other weekend during school and for a full week 4 times during summer. Her mother got her in the habit of sleeping with her and now she does not like to sleep alone. I think she should learn to sleep by herself. How should I go about changing this habit. I want her to be happy when she goes to bed. Her mother is not cooperative in this.

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• 51 melissa clark // Aug 18, 2009 at 9:44 pm

  How to go from bottle to sippy cup. A year old daughter doesn’t care for sippy cup.

  Thanks, Melissa Clark

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• 52 Jeff // Aug 18, 2009 at 9:58 pm

  For most of you the answer is simple – cry it out. I was a non-believer before feeling so overwhelmed that my wife and I tried it. My son is now 16 weeks old and it took 2 nights for him to sleep throughout the night with not so much as a whimper. Mom, Dad and son are all the more happy for it. Crying it out is the definition of short-term pain for long-term gain. And please don’t write back about psychological damage etc. etc. If any of you can remember how your folks put you to sleep when you were under a year old then you are one remarkable individual.

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• 53 kemi omodara // Aug 18, 2009 at 10:05 pm

  my 10 month is still on breast milk she doesn’t like baby formula but she takes small food like paste, boiled rice, and vegetables during the day than at night she relay on breast milk. she doesn’t sleep through the night because she often wake up to feed. Should I start wheeling her off the breast now? please help thanks.

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• 54 Mindy // Aug 19, 2009 at 12:35 am

  My son Ian is now 29 months old. I am mainly a single mom. His dad takes him 2-3 nights every other week. For his dad, he will sleep in the crib and sleep through the night (so he says). But for me, he still sleeps with me and wakes up anywhere from 1-4 times a night. Bedtime schedules are hard, as I am a nurse, and there are times that I dont get off until 730-8, so we dont get home from the babysitters until after 8. Additionally, I had to convert his crib at my place, as he had learned how to crawl out of the crib and I would wake up to the thud of him falling every night I had him in the crib. So, with it now a toddler bed, he can easily (but safely) get out of his bed and come running into my room and crawls into bed with me. His dad is willing to work with me to, I just dont know where to begin? Help!
  Thank you for your time.
  Mindy

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• 55 Maureen // Aug 19, 2009 at 2:31 am

  My daughter is 20 month and has had a good bedtime routine for a while now. She goes to bed at 7pm and wakes at 6:30am. Recently though she has been waking up at 5:30am and I havent been able to settle her. Pleas help.

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• 56 Ginger // Aug 19, 2009 at 6:56 am

  My 9 month old will not sleep on his own, we have tried to do the bath, bottle, bed- He will drink the bottle but when you lay him down he gets up and crys all the time, what else do I need to do?

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• 57 Heather // Aug 19, 2009 at 7:00 am

  I wanted to take a minute to thank you for all of your advice. My son was not a natural sleeper. Before I found your program, I would nurse him to sleep and then he would wake back up for more as I tried to but him in bed. I remember keeping a log of his sleep and he would sleep for 2 minutes then nurse for 2 minutes all night long. It was rough on him, rough on me, and rough on my marriage. After applying your techniques, he is a wonderful sleeper. We were able to take him on vacation with no problems, we are able to stray from our normal routine (staying out a little later than normal to visit family, or skipping the bath) and he still sleeps great. Last week he was sick and I let him sleep with me for a few nights. I was sure that would be the end of his sleeping success, but he transitioned back to his own bed with hardly a fight. We do have a rough night here and there, but for the he sleeps great (7pm – 8am) most nights. I have co-workers that are envious that I have a child who ‘allows’ ME to sleep through the night. Thanks a million!!

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• 58 genta // Aug 19, 2009 at 8:43 am

  hey Dana
  i have a 6 week old bay boy and he is so use to me rocking him to sleep in my arms that if i try a different technique he cries a lot. i try and feed him before he goes to sleep but that doesnt work and he wont stay with anyone but me i cant even go to the toilet unless he is calm or asleep which is not that often. i havent slept in 6 weeks cause i have to feed him 3 times a night and have him in my arms. please dana help my im losing my plot!

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• 59 Luisa // Aug 19, 2009 at 9:11 am

  I would like to transition Sian from her cot to a bed. I am due to have our second child 1st December. What is the smoothest way so there is little impact. Sian is 20 months.

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• 60 lisette // Aug 19, 2009 at 9:29 am

  My son is 5 months old and I breast feed. At night he sleeps from about 7:30/8 to 2/3 am once he wakes I try and sooth him but end up nursing him bc recently he is not nursing a full nursing every time during the day. I feel he might need this feeding but he is so consistent onthe wake up time, I also think he is just waking up bc he is trained to do so. He nurses about 15-20 mins then goes right back to sleep until 6:30 or 7. How do I stop the night time feeds…..or does he really need it? During the day he nurses about 5 times (average 15-20 in duration)

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• 61 Lisa // Aug 19, 2009 at 10:44 am

  Since my 9 month daughter starting crawling (she is also teething), we can’t get her down for an afternoon nap. My dad watches her 2 days a week and my sister watches her 2 days a week. Either my husband or I are with her for the other days. She takes her morning nap no problem but will not take an afternoon nap. She ends up falling asleep around dinner time and fights going to sleep at bedtime. She works herself into hysterics if you just put her in her crib. We’ve tried staying in the room with her until she falls asleep. laying her down each time she stands up. She ends up in hysterics until one of us ends up rocking her to sleep at which time she will sleep through the night. How do we get her to take her afternoon naps and get back on her schedule?

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• 62 Michelle // Aug 19, 2009 at 11:01 am

  Mariyah is 22 months, she falls asleep on her own but in the middle of the night she gets up & wants to come in my bed, I put her in just so I can go back to sleep. She was sleeping in her bed a night & now this is happening. What is the best way to break this? What other tips should I know to keep her in her crib, mind you it is in our room. Thanks

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• 63 Brittany Jessen // Aug 19, 2009 at 12:14 pm

  Hi my little girl is 7 months old and will not nap. When she was born all she wanted to do was sleep in my lap I would try to put her down but she would just wake up crying. I have tryed making her cry it out and that works for night. she will just go right to sleep no problem. but nap time is so hard I try the crying out thing and she just wont give in. I have tryed rocking her, staying in the room with her, and even driving her around I fill like I have tryed it all and I am tired and at a loss what should I do?

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• 64 Tiffany Anderson // Aug 19, 2009 at 12:15 pm

  I’m sorry you miss understood I don’t nurse him to sleep I lay him in his crib and he goes to sleep on his own, he does however wake up 1 to 2 times in the night to nurse, after nursing I put him back in his crib and the he cries.

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• 65 Mari Luz // Aug 19, 2009 at 12:44 pm

  My son is 3 years old, he doesn’t know how to fall to sleep by himself. I have to lay in bed with him until he fall to sleep. I tried the trick with the chair, I tried the nanny program ( sit in the floor), i tried to bride him with toys, candies, anything. Nothing works. And he still wakes up 3 times during the night. I’m exhausted, what should I do?

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• 66 Ashley // Aug 19, 2009 at 3:02 pm

  My daughter is 13 months old and she won’t fall asleep without a bottle. She usually wakes up at least once or twice during the night and again won’t go back to sleep without having her bottle. We have tried just using water but if she doesn’t have a bottle with milk she gets so worked up sometimes she throws up. How can I get my daughter to fall asleep without eating and not need a bottle throughout the night? Thanks for your time!

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• 67 amanda buckley // Aug 19, 2009 at 3:53 pm

  my 9 mth old son has been sleeping well since starting sleep sense program but has started to refuse his nap in the morning and is wakening at 5 am!!! now hes able to pull himself up at the crib he will just cry and not go back to sleep. nothing has changed in his routine and were exhausted. help!!!!

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• 68 drea // Aug 19, 2009 at 4:39 pm

  my daughter is 14 months old and is still waking up through the night for a bottle, maybe once or twice.. she also sleeps with me in my bed. how can i get her out of my bed and sleeping through the night?
  Thanks

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• 69 gilda naranjo // Aug 19, 2009 at 5:32 pm

  my 17 month old grandaughter has climbed out of her crib,mom took it down
  now she sleeps with mom dad iis in AFGHANISTSN,coming home soon
  when she is with me i have to be in the bed beside her we are afraid she will fall out of bed
  how is this problem solved
  Zoeys mattress is on floor she just wont sllep on it
  gilda

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• 70 Nicole // Aug 19, 2009 at 7:57 pm

  I have a 2 month old who has always had a betdtime routine and has fallen asleep on her own. For the past week she cries every time I put her down to sleep. She doesn’t always wake at night and if she does it’s only one time. How can I get her to fall asleep on her own again?

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• 71 Victoria // Aug 20, 2009 at 12:14 am

  My baby girl Sasha is 3 month old. Resently she stoped sleeping well during the night. She wakes up every hour. She sleeps in the same room with us but in her crib. The routine that we have is simple:
  a bath, bottle(EBM because she stoped taking my breast) and sleep. Before we were just putting her in her crib, pat her on her back and she was asleep.
  Now, we have to rock her till she falls a sleep. If we try to put her before she is asleep she SCREAMS!
  Things got even worse after we spent 4 days in the hospital. Now she falls asleep only with loud music on, and only if we hold her her back to our stomacks (before we were just holding her facing us). I can’t figure why.
  I tried “cry it out” for about 2-3 minutes, she gets even worse and it takes longer to calm her down.
  Even before hospital she for some reason stoped her regular routine naps. Be4 she had a 9am(1.5-2 hours), 1pm(1 hour) and 4pm (2 hours) naps , but then it got all messed up.
  I don’t know what to do. I can’t put her for a nap. Even if i manage she sleeps not more than an hour. She gets crancky and very irretated.
  Please help.
  I have read so many books, and tried so many technics that i am very confused….I don’t know what to do. I am very irretated myself….I don’t know how long i’ll last.

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• 72 Diana // Aug 20, 2009 at 12:35 am

  My 15month old little boy is an absolute gem throughout the day but come sleep time and it’s a nightmare!
  I have followed all your steps but the problems I am experiencing is not being able to fall asleep on his own unless I am beside him in his crib. It takes such a long time for him to fall asleep for he struggles, consistantly turning and checking to see if I am there. The minute I leave he screams in such a way that it is traumatic! I have tried your methods with the in and out comforting but he is so strong headed that he can go on for hours. It takes me an hour to put him to sleep with me being now by his crib hoping to fall asleep so that I can sneak out but yet then he wakes throughout the night (2-3times) screaming for me or my husband to be there. When we go in there he is fine the minute we leave he starts the traumatic screams. Is it ok to leave scream for so long? It seems the more we leave him the longer he goes on for and the more he really works himself up.?????
  But we cannot let him continue to do this
  Please assist if you can.

  Diana

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• 73 Penny // Aug 20, 2009 at 7:57 am

  Why does Jason need nursing for his sleep?

  He can’t go back to sleep during the night after waking up for breast feed.

  Jason wants to hold him during the day time, too.

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• 74 Angie // Aug 20, 2009 at 8:41 am

  My 6 month old daughter Ava nurses in order to get to sleep. I have tried nursing her and putting her to bed awake, but she will cry for hours until I nurse her to sleep. I have tried gentle pats, stroking her forhead, etc but nothing works. She also wakes up every 2-3 hours during the night and won’t go back to sleep unless she’s nursed. Please help!

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• 75 s // Aug 20, 2009 at 10:03 am

  hi dana,
  my kid is 2 years and 6month .he has some proplems in sleeping:
  1- he still sleep with me in the same room but in his bed.
  2- now i, ve another baby he is 2month now my big kid cannt sleep good i get parurate even when i take my little son and sleep in onther room to leave the room quite,he wqke up several times may be cryin gduring sleepin or wake up and callme loudly even his alway’s present with him. i hope he sleep alone in another room sleeping well and happy.

  best regards

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• 76 Thi // Aug 20, 2009 at 11:24 am

  my 6 month old daughter sleeps about 10 hours at night, but she doesn’t nap during the day. She always falls asleep while feeding, I try everything to wake her up but no successful. Sometimes she only has 30-45 mins nap in the afternoon. She keeps yawning and looks tired.How can I get her to sleep more?

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• 77 Lisa // Aug 20, 2009 at 12:12 pm

  Hi my son is going to be two is october,he has never slept through the night since day one. On top of not sleeping through the night he gets two bottles a day one for nap time and one before bed.wakes up all throughout the night and comes to lay with me in bed. I have tried just not giving him one but he will just scream and kick for a bottle so I give up after about 20 minutes it feels hopeless.He has never just been put in his bed awake because he just get right back out..we also share a room so it does make it harder . I dont even know where to start as far as taking him off the bottle and laying him in bed awake to go to sleep since it has never been done….where do I start??how do I start???

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• 78 david chony // Aug 20, 2009 at 1:22 pm

  Liam is sleeping better now, but he seems to be wakwing up at 3:30 4 am and not going back to sleep. He falls asleep by himself ok, at 7:45pm. He also started to fuss at nap time, and will not always nap.

  Thank You
  Dave

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• 79 nancy // Aug 20, 2009 at 9:22 pm

  Evelyn is nearly 4 months old , she is very good night sleeper, but not day sleep . She always sleep about 30 min , then wake , I have to pat , or rock ( take about 30 min to 45 min) her back to sleep , after about 30 min she wakes again , I did try “cry it out” , but it does not works . Please help

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• 80 Jamie // Aug 21, 2009 at 12:01 am

  Please answer Tamara’s question (post 41)! I have the same issue with my 21 month old getting up and coming to our room every 2-3 hours only to be turned around and escorted back to his room immediately. We’ve been doing this for months now. Thanks.

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• 81 amanda // Aug 22, 2009 at 1:27 pm

  How can I help my 10 month old sleep through the night? He goes down easily between 7 and 7:30, but then he wakes up sometimes once or up to three times before he gets up at 7. What can I do to change this sleep pattern? Any advice would be appreciated.

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• 82 Katy Dunne // Aug 23, 2009 at 11:47 am

  My daughter can’t sleep without her dummy. I try not to give it to her but she gives over worked and just won’t allow herself to sleep without it. She is a high needs baby and wakes up lots at night, she is 4 and half months. Would love some advise about how to get her to sleep without dummy without a screaming fit that doesn’t result in sleep anyway. Thanks Katy

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• 83 veronika // Aug 23, 2009 at 5:31 pm

  i have 15 weeks old boy call ruben he is still weaking up at night a was bath him 4 days about 7.30 night rutine but doesn`t work yet.do you think i have to continue or do you know somethink diferent what can help? thanks

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• 84 michelle Mullins // Aug 24, 2009 at 12:30 am

  My toddler is almost 2 and has just started protesting every time I put him down. He has been such a good sleeper since he was 9 months old. Now he cries and calls for mummy and will do so for over an hour. I’m a single mum and am finding this very hard when I’m on my own. Friends are telling me to leave him, as he is testing boundries but I am not sure this is the best method as I know this is a crucial time for him to learn self confidence and trust in me. If I go in and hold his hand for a while he will go off to sleep.I don’t want to set up this routine for too long though. Can you suggest anything else? Do you think it’s cruel to leave him for an 30- 45 mins?

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• 85 Rosemarie // Aug 24, 2009 at 11:58 am

  Nathaniel is 6 years old and has co-slept with me for the past 3 years following a nightmare. Recently I told him he is a big boy and now needs to sleep in his own bed. I have not been able to get him to sleep through the night. Initially when I put him to bed, he would come out crying and saying he’s scared, you could feel the panic in him. So, I started laying sown in his bed with him till he fell asleep. But he gets up 2-3 times in the middle of the night. comes in my room, wakes me and then I walk him back to his room. He had wanted a build-a-bear, so I told him if he slept in his own bed I would get for him, I should have been more specific with the terms. We got the bear(dog). But it hasn’t helped. I have tryed a chart using happy or sad faces that hasn’t worked. I’ve tryed sitting on the floor instead of laying down with him, he will fall asleep but is up again throught the night. I’m so exhausted I can’t see straight. Last night I found myself yelling at him and then crying because I’m so tired. He starts school soon and I don’t know what we are going do. This can’t go on like this. Neither of us are able to get up before 9am. We have been working on this for nearly a month now.
  Please help us.
  Thanks. Rosemarie

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• 86 Nadine // Aug 24, 2009 at 12:25 pm

  hey Dana,

  Thank you so much for doing this for us! I have a question. My son Ashtin is 4 and a half months old. We’ve had a really rough time, he was extremely colic- “classified” as high maintenance and so very fussy. He is doing better now, we had him on Rinitidine for a while, but now he’s off of it ( my idea). I use to wake up like 5 times, feed him, and put him to bed asleep. He has soooo much gas and they actually really stink, and that’s why i couldn’t put him to bed awake because he would cramp so much from his gas. How do I put him to bed awake when I know he’s in pain?? I don’t know what to do here. If you could just let me know what you think. I”ve tried all kinds of different ways to help him go to sleep, but the only two ways that have worked are at the breast asleep or crying himslef to sleep :( Thank you and I’m a desperate tired mom in need.
  Take care,
  Nadine

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• 87 negin // Aug 24, 2009 at 3:41 pm

  Hi Dana
  thanks for helping Aysa’s sleep now is good and also when she eats very well she has good sleep .

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• 88 negin // Aug 24, 2009 at 3:58 pm

  please answer s question (post 75) I have the same problem but she sleep’s beside me.Thanks.

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• 89 Vanessa // Aug 24, 2009 at 9:52 pm

  Hi Dana-

  I have a three year old who wakes up several times in the night. We try to put her back in her own bed but she often comes back after a hour or so and usually ends up sleeping with us. Any suggestions on how to keep her in her bed all night?

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• 90 April // Aug 24, 2009 at 9:58 pm

  Hi Dana. I agree with post 42. I have a feeding vs. sleep problem. I didn’t have a good birthing experience and with all the stress and anxiety with my new baby who was born with breathing and eating problems (as well as other life changing events); I don’t know what to do anymore. In terms of sleeping my 4 1/2 month old associates quiet noise with sleep. He won’t take a nap unless I play music and rock him. Everyone tells me he needs to get used to noise because he won’t stay asleep when we go out of the house. (My husband and I are quiet people). The only way he will sleep is on his tummy and will wake up if I try to change his diaper or reposition him (especially his daytime naps). In terms of eating, he eats while he sleeps because of the sucking and I have attempted many times to wake him up and get him out of the habit of doing it (which I believe he acquired while I was trying to breastfeed him). I can’t tell when he’s hungry anymore and didn’t realize I was overfeeding him around 2 months (because I just bottlefed him) and was diagnosed with acid reflux. He also has weak intestines and stains a lot to move his bowels. Other than his sleeping and eating patterns he is a happy and very alert baby, but I don’t know what to do anymore; my husband and I could use some parenting tips/advice! We appreicate your help :)

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• 91 Natasha // Aug 25, 2009 at 1:19 pm

  Max is now 6 1/2 months. Up to a month ago we were doing well with daytime naps (every 2 to 2 1/2 hours) and nighttime sleeps – 8hrs. During a two week trip just Max and I , the 3 hour timezone, teething and growth spurt changed things and they haven’t changed back following our return over a week ago. I don’t know what to do.

  While staying with friends he would begin his sleep in the playpen and somewhere around midnight, he would awake and need a feed to soothe him back to sleep. Max would then wake up and need feeding every 2-3 hours until his morning wakeup time of 7:30am. I realized that these were bad habits starting up again but didn’t feel that leaving him cry and wake up the entire household was an option.

  Last week was our first week back and the same habits continued. Living in an apartment I am sensitive to our neighbours and don’t want to wake them up in the middle of the night if I leave Max cry a little. After 6 days back, I was relieved he slept 7 hours and I thought we were on track again. however the next night when he woke up at 4:30am trying to crawl in his crib and he wouldn’t fall back asleep until 6:30am. I had to use the swing to get him back to sleep.

  I am wondering if starting cereal will help settle him and keep him down longer throughout the night. Thank you for your insight.

  Natasha

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• 92 BECKY // Mar 4, 2010 at 12:42 am

  6 week old formula fed baby was drinking about 2.5 – 3 ounces of formula every 2-3 hours… she is now drinking about 1 ounce, then refusing to eat more and then hungry again in another 30 minutes to 1 hour…..this is exausting !!!! Do i need to try and hold her off for at least 2-3 hours and try and make her eat more or what??? Please help….is this normal ???? She used to sleep for longer periods at night too and this has changed too with her new eating habits !! Thought it was just growth spurt but not sure now as it has been going on for more than a week and a half.

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