78 responses so far ↓

• 1 Shannon Lucas // Feb 24, 2009 at 9:33 am

  I want to be a little more specific about Logan.
  He is 3 years old. He is on a schedule. Bed time is 8:00 used to be 8:30. Because he stopped taking naps.
  He was brought up on me rocking him to sleep ( I never breast fed to sleep), but when I had Em who is now 20 months I stopped rocking him, mostly because I had to tend to her. At first it wasn’t a big deal. But as time went on, by the time he turned 2 1/2 I have been fighting with him about going to bed. Then shortly after he started waking up in the middle of the night and started crawling into bed with us. (At this time I was still pushing nap time).
  When he turned 3 and shortly after, I am now preg. with our third and I’m very tired.
  So I switched some things. I went a head and stopped fighting him on naps, but he has to stay in his room for quite time. Because of this I moved his bed time from 8:30 to 8:00. I was still fighting bed time and him crawling into bed with us. (Supper time is at 6:00, we have very little junk to none in our home)
  So in the last few weeks I went back to rocking him to sleep which nocks him out in 5 min. NO Fighting. I know this is the soothing, but there is no fighting and he wants us to lay in bed with him any way so what is worse?
  My problem is he still wakes up in the night. I heard to try walking him back to bed. So I have started doing that, but I end up sleeping in his bed for the rest of the night because I’m to tired to fight with him or wait for him to go to sleep.
  Here is the times, if I would let him he would wake up at 6:00, but again I usually end up in bed with him or him in mine until 7:00 at least.
  So I walk him back to bed what else can I do to keep him asleep all night.
  I have been lucky that he on most cases is not cranky. But I do want him to sleep through the night and until at least 7:00.

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• 2 reem // Feb 24, 2009 at 10:53 am

  hi,I am Reem,mother of 11 monthes old boy facing problem with his sleep,he falls a sleep easily but awakened after 2-3 hours crying and it is very difficult to make him fall as leep again unless I hold him,rub his ears or play with his hair,his father took him to bed in the last couple of days and my baby slept right away with him….I read in your website some helpful ideas but until now I couldnt make him follow one…can you help me?
  thanks
  reem

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• 3 Rebecca // Feb 24, 2009 at 10:55 am

  I have a 20 month old who is waking up cranky from her nap. We recently (a few months ago) cut her down to one nap a day. She was taking two 1.5 hour naps a day and now she will only sleep 1.5 hours. That, and she is now waking earlier in the morning. I know she is tired! But i’m at a loss as to what to do. I’ve tried making her nap earlier during the day (noon instead of one) but she still only sleeps 1.5 hours and then wakes up screaming. Help!!

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• 4 Regina Wehner // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:07 am

  My 13-week-old daughter has some trouble with her sleep schedule. She has slept in her crib for 7-8 hours at a time, but she will not go to bed until 1-2 AM! It was O.K for awhile, but not possible now that I am back at work. We’ve tried putting her down every night at 6:30-7 and let her cry, but she’ll cry for 6-7 hours. What can we do?

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• 5 Tammy // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:15 am

  HI!
  I Have 18 month old twin boys. They are good sleepers and go to bed on their own at night. The only problem is is that they have pacifiers and we would like to break them off of them soon. We were wondering what is the best way to do with without causing too much distress at bedtime. We have three other children and don’t want to keep the whole household awake.

  Thanks
  Tammy

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• 6 Amy // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:17 am

  My 22month old daughter does suffer from night terrors, and the difference can not be missed. I took my daughter to a neurologist because I actually thought she was having seizures. In a night terror they are not up and walking around, they are not responsive to anything and it looks like you could look right through them. I feel for those getting up every night with wandering children but sometimes I would rather have that than watch my daughter have a night terror.

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• 7 lashawna // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:41 am

  My daughter will be 8 weeks on March 1st. She can stay awake from 11:00 p.m until 7:00am the following morning. I have other kids to prepare for school and my baby’s sleeping pattern has me extremely tired and unable to function properly for the other kids. Is there a solution to this problem?

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• 8 Heidi // Feb 24, 2009 at 12:03 pm

  I have twins and one of them does sleep pretty much through the night, but one he gets up screaming at the top of his lungs and will not go back to sleep with out me changing his diaper or giving a bottle or rocking him to sleep sometimes. What can cause his to just scream at the top of his lungs like that. He is waking up my other twin sometimes when he does this. Please help seems like he regress back to when he was a baby. He is now 18 month old.

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• 9 Lise // Feb 24, 2009 at 12:25 pm

  My problem is with both my boys. One is four and the other is two, they share a room and neither is a great sleeper. The four year old claims he is afraid of the dark & monsters and generally sleeps with his dad. My two year old seems to want to nurse or be held by me. He will generally sleep 3-4 hours at the beginning of the night but by 11:00 he “needs” me in there. If we let them “cry it out”, the other will awaken as well. How do I get them to both go to sleep and stay that way without disrupting everyone else’s sleep. (We also have a 13 year old daughter whose room is across the hall)

  Thank you

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• 10 denise // Feb 24, 2009 at 12:45 pm

  I have 3 year old twin girls that both suffer from night terrors. This video was very useful to me. My daughters have never been good sleepers and I’m sometimes confused from a night terror and them just wanted to sleep with me. Now I know if they are up walking around they are not having a night terror and can react appropriate to the situation. I’m just hoping that they will out grow the night terror soon. I need to get get some sleep.

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• 11 Kim // Feb 24, 2009 at 12:57 pm

  How long do you keep your child in a crib if she can climb out of if? Would it be safer to switch to a toddler bed?

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• 12 Becky // Feb 24, 2009 at 1:20 pm

  My 10 month old son goes to sleep at 8pm and is wide awake every morning at 6am. Typically his diaper is very wet, if it hasn’t leaked through to wet his clothes. Ideally he would sleep in a little longer, but he won’t. We were concerned that the wet clothes were causing him to wake up, so we started using larger diapers with a plastic diaper cover over it and it does the trick! So now he wakes up with dry clothes and dry sheets! But having dry clothes and sheets, hasn’t encouraged him to sleep in a little longer. I am a morning person, so could it be that he has gotten enough sleep from 8am to 6am and is a morning person too? Any tips for encouraging him to sleep in longer? If we leave him in his crib, he chews it up and cries to be picked up. Thank you!

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• 13 penny evans // Feb 24, 2009 at 1:45 pm

  My little girl suffered from night terrors at 2 she was taken in to hospital to be watched on a camera in the night as everybody said she was too young to have nite terrors but they where confirmed by the doctors as night terrors thank goodness she now grown out of them they are very distressing for parents but my daughter new nothing about what she was doing.

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• 14 Darci // Feb 24, 2009 at 2:10 pm

  I have my 3 month old sleeping very well and he goes down on his own for night and naps but it is because he sucks his thumb! What are your thoughts on thumb-sucking?!

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• 15 Helene // Feb 24, 2009 at 2:20 pm

  I would like to have more info on night terrors. i really think that’s what Caleb has.It’s so sad cause it happens around the same time every night. if i’m lucky it only happens once a night. and nothing I do helps him. he’s fighting in his sleep, his legs are just kicking away, and in the morning it’s like nothing ever happened.

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• 16 Kris // Feb 24, 2009 at 3:39 pm

  My grandson sometimes plays in the pack n play at home. When he is at our home he sleeps in a pack n play. He seems to be going to sleep okay, without much crying, 10 minutes or less, is it okay or do we need to get a crib so it is different than what he plays in occasionally. thanks

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• 17 Kate // Feb 24, 2009 at 4:32 pm

  Dana-My two year old is an inconsistent sleeper. She falls asleep beautifully at night with no assistance and can sleep through the night, often self-settling when she wakes. However, once or twice a week she does require some attention (although we can get good runs of 5 to 7 nights where she sleeps through). She does not require a lot of attention, usually just some quick comfort and tucking her back in, but I would like this to stop. She has had some ear troubles, but we have been given the all clear so I don’t think this is effecting her sleep any longer. I look forward to your advice. Thanks.

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• 18 Kristen // Feb 24, 2009 at 5:05 pm

  I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter. She used to just go to sleep very easily but as of a month or so ago she won’t go to sleep without me in the room. Then when she goes to sleep she won’t stay asleep. I end up sleeping on the floor in her room or bringing her in my bed. I’m too tired to fight in the middle of the night. We are switching her to a big girl bed because she can climb out of her crib and she doesn’t seem to like the toddler bed. I also figure that if she has a big bed in her room at least I won’t have to sleep on the floor.

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• 19 Claire // Feb 24, 2009 at 5:29 pm

  Hi,

  My daughter is 6 months on Friday and goes down to sleep about 7pm then I wake her up at 10.30pm to give her another feed and then she goes straight back down however she does take a soother and is waking up frequently during the night when it falls out.. probably about once ever hour. I don’t know what to do. How do I get rid of the soother?

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• 20 mary // Feb 24, 2009 at 5:31 pm

  hi,i have a 2/12 yr old nd he slept with us 4 sometime but now we want him to sleep in his own bed but all he does is cry nd scream till he gets a temperature nd when he finally falls asleep, he wakes 3-4 times every night.i also have a 7month old who wont sleep either,pls help am at my wits end

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• 21 mary // Feb 24, 2009 at 5:37 pm

  he used to have naps but i had to struggle with bedtime which is if he has a nap around1-3 that means he would go to bed around 1am so i stopped him with the naps nd he goes to bed around 7-7-30pm and wakes up 2-3 hours later nd start to cry.an he is a very energetic boy,i can say he is overactive.pls help

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• 22 LJ // Feb 24, 2009 at 5:45 pm

  I have an 11 month old son. He has never been a good sleeper whether it is nap time or night time. He finally started getting better at the morning nap (usually about 2 hours…used to be 45 minutes). We still struggle with the afternoon nap and now we are struggling with going to bed at night. We are pretty good about sticking to a routine at bedtime. After his bath I give him his bottle and rock him to sleep. Some nights he will go to sleep right away and some nights he will fight it for almost an hour. Once he is asleep, he will sleep for a couple to three hours, but will then wake right about the time my husband and I try to go to bed. Then I struggle with him throughout the night. He does not take a bottle during the night, but I have caved in and I do bring him to bed with us in hopes of getting some sleep. There are some nights I see every hour on the clock (this makes for a really long day at work). He used to sleep good when he came to our bed, but now he isn’t comfortable there either. When he wakes it seems like he is still sleeping, but he will throw himself around and will figit uncontrollably. I can’t find it in me to leave him in his room to cry. I have tried to soothe him and tell him it’s still night, night and rub his back but it’s not working. What can I do to break this cycle?

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• 23 Nicole // Feb 24, 2009 at 6:15 pm

  My daughter is 5 months old. She has her last feed at night about 7pm and will sleep consistently for about 9 hours but then she is awake from 4am for 2 to 3 hrs! I’ve tried re-settling her, letting her cry and feeding her but nothing seems to work. I have a toddler also so am conscious of not wanting to wake her. My toddler wakes about 7am so basically I start my day at 4am! Is there any advice to solve this problem?

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• 24 Carole // Feb 24, 2009 at 7:17 pm

  My little girl Leonie is 15 month-old. She is an active child. She is still having naps in the morning and in the afternoon (lasting about 1 hour each). In the evening she has a full dinner, then we have a bath together. She is drinking her milk (not breastmilk) while I put her pyjamas on, and finishes it in her bed (250 ml). She goes to sleep easily around 8pm but always seem to wake up between 11pm and midnight. She won’t go back to sleep til I give her a bit more milk. Before going to bed myself, I place a bottle of water, not milk, in her bed. If I hear her cry during the night, I wait and she normally eventually goes back to sleep. I know she is not hungry as she always has a good dinner. I also understand I shouldn’t let her have her milk while going to sleep in her bed but when would be a good time to give it to her? For her day naps, I try to get her used to go down with just some water and it normally works. Thank you for your time and your help.

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• 25 kylie // Feb 24, 2009 at 8:25 pm

  my problem is with my 20 month old son. He goes to bed happily and chats and bounces around until he eventually crashes but then he usually wakes about 5 times a night, usually starting at around 10:30 pm. All I have to do to stop the crying is to go into his room and say its night time, go to sleep and then leave. Occasionally this doesn’t work and from about 5 in the morning it doesn’t work and he asks for cuddles and usually ends up in our bed so i can get that last valuable hour of sleep, but what on earth do I do to get him to return to sleep by himself between those other hours? I am exhausted!

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• 26 Tasha // Feb 24, 2009 at 9:11 pm

  Anthony is 17months and still sleeps in my bed. I try puttin him in his crib once he’s asleep. He’ll end up waking up at 2/3am and back in our bed. I can probably count the times he slept through the night in his crib. Lately he doesn’t go to bed until really late at night sometimes 1o-11pm.It’s like he’s waiting for us to go sleep. I’m expecting our second child in July and would really want to try to get him out of our bed. Any suggestions?

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• 27 Kiryn // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:14 pm

  Hi,

  My daughter is 4 months old and just over a week ago we began teaching her to self-settle. She has responded brilliantly and is usually asleep within 15 minutes.

  She is sleeping well at night (from 8pm to 5am, then fed, changed and back down until 8am or 9am).

  However, she is STILL catnapping during the day. She usually gives me tired signs (rubbing eyes, grimacing, jerky movements) within one hour of being up, and as I said above after putting her down she’ll settle herself and fall asleep usually within 15 minutes, but she continues to wake after just one sleep cycle. I give her an opportunity to resettle, but after 20 - 30 minutes of grizzling I usually go in to her room, tell her its still ’sleepytime’ and go back over the last part of our bedtime/naptime routine (without picking her up). Last week this worked brilliantly, but this week she is fighting the sleep and is staying awake until her next feed.

  How can I break this habit?

  Thanks.

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• 28 Sonia // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:20 pm

  My daughter is 3 months old. She generally has her last feed at 9 but I am trying for earlier. she gets to sleep quite well with a dummy and I am still wrapping her. My problem is the wrapping. If I wrap her, she wakes at 2am and then at 4am on and off struggling to get out of the wrap. If I put her down un wrapped she’ll still wake at the same times with her arms flapping around. I have to re-wrap her and she’ll then settle again but she’ll still keep trying to get out so I’m forever re-wrapping during the night. The dummy will help her to stop the struggle sometimes. Is this just something I have to put up with for a while or is there something I can do? Thank you

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• 29 julia // Feb 24, 2009 at 11:30 pm

  i have a 22 month old baby girl and she has never have been a good sleeper at all.well she still on a bottle and it sems that she love it and the problem is her father gives the bottle when she comes from daycare what can i do?well my daughter has very bad night terrors and about 3:00 she get up ans yell for father and then my name and again 6:00 then she sleep good.i was just wondering if she is going to all this all the time? she been sleeping good at daycare ann when she is home from daycare she fights us bacause she does not want to take a nap and finally she take a nape 4 about 3 hrs can you tell me what is going on with my daughter sleep at night and nap time????

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• 30 melinda // Feb 25, 2009 at 12:46 am

  my daughter bridie has night terrors is there anything you can do while they are having one to try and snap them out of it or do you just let it pass and comfort them. she is nearly 3 and has a few a night. thanks

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• 31 Krisanne // Feb 25, 2009 at 1:49 am

  I want to comment on Shannon Lucas’ comment. I too have a 3 year old boy who has been waking up nightly anywhere from 2-6 times a night - screaming. He is not having night terrors because he remembers them and they happen later into his sleep (3+ hours after going to bed). Today is Tuesday night, on Sunday, my husband and I talked to him several times that day about his waking and screaming. We told him that we were not going to continue to let him do that…that it wasn’t healthy for him (or for us). We had him practice getting in and out of bed all by himself and pulling the covers up over him. We put a sippy cup of water next to his bed incase he got thirsty. We encouraged him that he could do it. That night when he woke up at 11pm, we let him call out and we didn’t respond. That is, until he started jumping up and down and hitting the door. He never came out of the room, but he just pitched a fit. My husband went in to talk calmly about our talks during the day. It was helpful b/c it’s me that has a hard time hearing him cry for “mommy.” He ended up crying for about an hour, then finally put himself back to bed and slept - the rest of the night. In the morning, we praised him for putting himself back to sleep. Last night, we had the battle at bedtime. It lasted about 30 minutes….and he slept through the night. Again, we encouraged him and praised him for how well he did at putting himself to sleep. Tonight….no battle and we will see how things go all night. But i suspect that it will be un-eventful. The hardest thing was hearing him cry for me for the hour or half hour respectively. I’m hoping and praying that he isnt’ scarred for life! I feel like 3 years old is too old to let them cry it out. My husband encourages me, as well as others, that it is strictly behavioral and it needs to be corrected. I can totally relate to Shannon; that the sheer exhaustion makes you unwilling to “fight”. But what motivated me was knowing that he wasn’t getting the sleep his little body needs either. That the lack of sleep can affect him detrimentally: behavior during the day, ability to learn and concentrate, etc. Not to mention that it can make mommies and daddies not too nice in the middle of the night!

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• 32 Krisanne // Feb 25, 2009 at 1:58 am

  The question part and some impt info…..
  we were in a car accident last july. since then, he has been bothered by cars driving by outside our condo when he goes to sleep. the parking/driveway/street is about 20 yards away and we are on the second floor. For a long time, i thought it was dreams about cars and couldn’t bear to not respond to his cries. But between not getting sleep, realizing that he’s not sleeping, and feeling like a one or two time event (bad dreams) has turned into a bad habit, we had to try something. Thankfully, the first night we let him cry it out, our downstairs neighbors weren’t home. And his little sister (1 1/2)slept through the whole thing. Yes, they share a room. Dana, do you have any comments on this?

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• 33 Philippa Davison // Feb 25, 2009 at 5:37 am

  I have twins, nearly 5 months old.

  Tess does not sleep too bad - she has mild exzema and scratches. I am currently swaddling her and that seems to be working. However, Charlie wakes up constantly through the night. He is very restless. The dummy falls out and he crys. He sleeps in a sleeping bag so he can’t throw his blankets off and I have placed soft cloth toys next to him in the hope that he will hold these for comfort when he wakes up as opposed to the dummy. He falls asleep on his own around 7pm after his night time bottle - he has not had bottles throught the night for about 5 weeks. When he wakes I pop his dummy in and say ’sleepy time’ he drops off again, but half and hour/an hour later he wakes. I don’t bring him in our bed - except maybe once when I was so tired.
  I have read as much from books, etc on what to do and have ran out of suggestions! Please help!

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• 34 Gil // Feb 25, 2009 at 5:59 am

  My son Joshua is 20 months and until he turned 1 he was an excellent sleeper. Now he won’t go down until I cuddle him. He has always woken during the night and I took him into bed with me but this was usually at 4 or 5 in the morning and I had managed a good few hours sleep. Now he is waking at 10 at night and getting into bed with me. I have tried leaving him to cry etc but this always results in him making himself sick and/or throwing himself out his cot - which obviously just gets me more upset. I am at end of my (exhausted) tether - please help!!!

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• 35 Julie // Feb 25, 2009 at 9:27 am

  Daniel will be 15 months old when we fly to Florida for a holiday. Not relishing the 8/9 hour flight with Daniel as he’s now walking and into everything !! Do you recommend any remedies/miracles for a hasslefree/worryless flight ?? Thank you Julie

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• 36 Sydney // Feb 25, 2009 at 9:59 am

  My five and a half month old just started sleeping in her crib two weeks ago. Everything was going well but now we seem to be going backwards. She is now waking every two hours because she wants her pacifier. She won’t go back to sleep unless she has it. She is still unable to put it back in herself yet. She would never wake when we had her in the swing to sleep. She would sleep twelve hours at a time but since the crib I feel like I have a newborn again. What are your suggestions on how to break this habit of waking every two hours.

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• 37 Sara // Feb 25, 2009 at 10:38 am

  My son is finally starting to sleep through the night but is now getting up about 5:30am instead of 6:30am. He goes to bed consistently at around 8:30pm.

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• 38 Sara // Feb 25, 2009 at 10:39 am

  Any advice to get him to sleep a bit longer in the morning?

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• 39 Gina // Feb 25, 2009 at 1:07 pm

  My son is 15 months old and I still rock him to sleep every night. I feel that I can not make him cry it out because we live in an apartment and he sleeps in with my husband and I. I have two other children 11 and 8 years old. He does not take good naps either, he usually sleeps in the car when we are out, he goes with the flow. Also he has had an on and off ear infection for about 3 months. He also wakes during the night and I put him in bed with us. He use to sleep through the night from 4 months to 11 months then everything changed. What can I do? I am so confused.

  Thank you

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• 40 Lyndsi // Feb 25, 2009 at 3:48 pm

  We still swaddle my 5 month old and are almost ready to start with your program to get him to learn to sooth himself. We have tried letting one arm out at a time, but he wakes himself up with his hand 10+ times during the night. It is miserable for everyone and it is so tempting to swaddle him again so he (and I) can sleep. When we start your program is it ok to stop swaddling him, and take away his passifier at the same time? I feel like we have provided way too many props and don’t know the best way to stop.

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• 41 Kelly // Feb 25, 2009 at 5:09 pm

  Kate is almost 10 months old now. We have been putting her to be in her crib for over a month now, even though she is very tired when I put her down she instantly goes into “play” mode. Whether I sit there or sometimes she lets me leave it usually lasts about 10-20 min. Then she always starts crying. Even if I sit right beside the crib and pat her back, careful to stop patting and just rest my hand as she calms and then try to remove my hand altogether before she falls asleep. This entire process can take up to 1 1/2 hours to put her to bed and she still cries herself almost to sleep every time even though I am there with her.

  The bedtime routine is fairly consistant with changing into PJ’s (sometimes after a bath) a bottle, a cuddle, spending a few minutes in her room before laying her down.

  How do I get her to fall asleep without crying and needing me to pat her back to calm her etc. I can’t get out of the room and if I do it’s for 10 min and then back again.

  I usually spend a minimum of 1/2 hour every night just sitting beside her crib patting her, giving her her blanket, laying her down and saying “shhh” and “head down”

  I feel like I am not getting anywhere and it’s been a month!

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• 42 Becky // Feb 25, 2009 at 5:38 pm

  Hi, my name is becky and i have a 2 1/2 year old little boy who will not stay in him bed at night. I already do the take him back to be thing, but as he has a gate on his bedroom door, if i don’t let him out to come in our bed, and try to go into his room, he just goes mad, stamps on the floor and then throw’s himself on the floor and it is almost impossible to pick him up. I am so tired of doing this - mentally and pysically, that i let him come in our bed after about the 3rd time, just so i can get SOME sleep. Please, please help! x

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• 43 Lindy Comeau // Feb 25, 2009 at 5:39 pm

  I need help with my son. He is 10 weeks old and hates sleeping in his crib! He usually wakes up within a half hour to an hour of being in his crib. He loves sleeping in his car seat, but lately I’ve been hearing how bad that is for babies. Any suggestions?

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• 44 Vanessa // Feb 25, 2009 at 5:47 pm

  My son Connor , 3 , had night terrors and after much research we have found that we give him magnesium in the morning in some milk and a herb based vitamin called Kalm kids at night, it calms his nerous system. It is really good and I found this out from my chemist when I refussed to give him drugs, it is all herbal and he is sleeping through now - the first time ever! and only gets up for a toilet stop - the next challenge.

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• 45 Sherry // Feb 25, 2009 at 8:32 pm

  Hi Ariana is getting a little better at sleeping on her own but i find my problem is she wakes me up about once a night now , but i’m so tired and end up crashing in her room which i know isn’t good or i’ll be tired and end up crashing as i put her to sleep how do i get her to sleep the whole night in her room without waking up she used to me lying next to her but i want to be in my own bed instead some those nights i crash in her small bed it hurts my back an i would love to be cuddle my man?

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• 46 Sherry // Feb 25, 2009 at 8:34 pm

  I put alias name last time cause did’t know how secure/private site is . Her name is Ariana

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• 47 Daniel Kroker // Feb 25, 2009 at 9:37 pm

  Firstly thank you, I’ve been following your advice for a while now with great results - Talon used to wake 5 times a night before following your advice.

  He will now be 2 in April. He is pretty good at sleeping through the night but he regularly has a bowel movement at 5 or 6 in the morning. This will often wake him up and he won’t be able to get back to sleep - but he is overtired and very grumpy. If I try and put him back to bed he will often scream and refuse to go back to bed, If I leave he can become hysterical and have a temper tantrum until I let him out.

  Talon’s my first child, I have no idea if his behaviour is normal or what to do about it to calm him down and put him back to bed?

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• 48 Allie Langham // Feb 26, 2009 at 11:29 am

  Hi there
  My son is 5 years old and we are having real problems with him waking in the night. He goes to bed between 7.30 - 8 and generally wakes 3 - 4 times everynight. He wakes crying and can’t usually tell us why. He asks for cuddles usually. When he goes to bed we lie on his bed to read storys and we always leave the room before he is asleep. Help - we really don’t know what to do. He has been doing this on and off for a couple of years. We go through stages when he has not done it for a couple of months, then it goes back again. It’s starting to affect his behaviour during the day as he is so tired. I hope you can help as I am at a loss what to do next.
  Many thanks
  Allie & Chris (mum and dad to Max - 5)

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• 49 Stacey // Feb 26, 2009 at 6:08 pm

  My 8 month old daughter usually goes to bed awake at about 7:30pm. She will grizzle for about 5 minutes and then sleep through.
  The last two weeks she has started standing up in cot and howling as soon as we put her to bed.
  We have tried leaving her but she cries until she makes herself sick. We also tried just going in, laying her down and walking out, but she just keeps getting straight back up again and gets more and more fired up.
  We have resorted to patting her to sleep but a worried we are going to form bad habits.

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• 50 Sleepless in Australia // Feb 26, 2009 at 6:43 pm

  My daughter is 14 months old and up until around 11 months was a great night sleeper. She goes down to sleep by herself chats, plays in her cot for a while and then falls asleep on her own, usually by 7.15-7.30pm. She has 1 nap a day for around 2 hours. She wakes up 1-3 times most nights, sits up in her cot crying and crying. We usually wait for a few minutes and all I have to do is go in tell her its time to sleep, tell her to lie down, give her blankie toy and leave the room. She will go back to sleep on her own, but we are also at a loss as to why this keeps on happening. I don’t feed her throughout the night, she goes to sleep on her own at bedtime with a set routine (bath, pj’s, brush teeth, drink of water, story then bed). What do we need to do to get her to re-settle herself back to sleep throughout the night on her own? Is this a comfort thing? We are very, very tired…

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• 51 barbara // Feb 26, 2009 at 9:45 pm

  My daughter Tristan is 20 months old and still waking throught the night. She can fall asleep completely on her own without a cup but she wakes up once for a cup about 3 hours after she falls asleep. Then, the second time she falls asleep she is up from about 2 am till 7 am and I have school at 9 am. If she does not wake for good she will wake up 3 or more times for a cup. I give her about 3 oz. of milk each time. If I do not give her a cup she screams and cries until she is completely awake (about 15-20 minutes). I am so exhausted and tired towards the end of the day. What can I do?

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• 52 Glen // Feb 27, 2009 at 5:17 am

  There is a lot more to night terrors than what Dana has mentioned. My son started getting them at age 10 , only when he had a fever (which is common), he would get out of bed screaming that someone was trying to put needles in his eyes. Usually the same thing every time. He has ran from the house in terror and always had a fixed glaze, he looked straight through you. There was nothing you could do to calm him, it had to run its course which was about 20 mins. He is 15 now and hasnt had one for about 12 months, he came into our room and through a can of beer on the ground that he had got from the fridge and then proceded to bang his head on the wall (dry wall), a few times I would put him in the car and drive which seemmed to work. He would always feel embaressed and would always tell me how much he loved me and then would go back to sleep. One remedy is to wake them before it usually happens as it is always the same time(about 1-2 hours after going to sleep. As Dana said they are suppposed to grow out of them but there are some people that still have them as adults. Look up Night Terrors on the net and you will amazed at the stories. They used to scare the hell out of me until I educated myself.

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• 53 Rockie // Feb 28, 2009 at 4:19 pm

  We have a beautiful 12 month old girl…and she sleeps great if she is in bed with us.It is all good when she was smaller and less active but now she is very mobile.I am afraid she will fall out of bed.She use to fall asleep by 8:30 now she stays up till 11:00.We have tried to put her in her crib in her room and all it does is sends her into a fit of crying eventually she will fall asleep …but when she wakes she will also be upset and will not let me go for anything or she will cry if I put her down even if just for a second.It makes it hard as I have just started back to work.We have also tried moving her crib in our room but it still has the same results ,if she falls asleep she wakes about a hour later and is very upset!Help we would love to get her asleep in her bed without waking the whole house.She is just very much a cuddle bug and likes to sleep with us!

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• 54 darcell // Mar 1, 2009 at 10:39 pm

  My daughter R, sometimes sleeps through the night. She is 2 years and 8 months. She usually goes to bed between 11:-11:30 p.m. If she goes to bed at that time she will usually sleep until 9 or 10, sometimes she wakes up around 5:30-6:30 am, comes to bed with me until 9 or 10. If she goes to bed earlier, then she wakes up between 4-4 am. My husband doesn’t want her to cry at all and goe to get her, brings her to bed with me. I work at night so I like to sleep until at least 9 am, but I would’nt mind getting up earlier if she slept cosistantly. I would like to get her to bed at
  8 pm. How do my husband and I get on the same page to get her to sleep. We are both tired because we are not getting enough?

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• 55 nova // Mar 2, 2009 at 5:06 pm

  from my experience night terrors are not out grown with everybody i guess my boyfriend still gets night terrors but it was moreso before i gave birth to my son it was every night i had to wake him up from a terror now it happens maybe once a month i think its due to stress but he sayshes had them his whole life. what do you say?

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• 56 DEEPA SRINATH // Mar 2, 2009 at 9:00 pm

  hi

  i hane a daughter who is 8 years old. she is always disturbed in a sleep. she talks,cryes and some times get up from her bed and trys to walk and bang her body into the wall and then when i bring her to her bed she is fast assleep.I feel she is very tired when she get up in mornings without proper sleep.this dosen happen just once in the night very offen.please can u help me out to bring in control.pls mail me ASAP.I desprately need your replay.thank you.

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• 57 Andrea // Mar 3, 2009 at 1:48 am

  i need to start preparing to ween my 7.5 month old baby but have had a hard time getting her to take a bottle of formula. she will take pumped milk but not the formula. i have been giving her formula in her cereal as a means of slowly allowing her body to adjust to the change…but she is now the major hurdle. i need to ween to go back on a medication that is not ok to Bfeed while taking, so pumping will not be an option. she is also quite accustomed to being nursed to sleep. she was quite colicky when she was younger and it became one of the few, reliable ways to get her to settle to sleep. oh well - one step at a time! we are kind of in deep right now, but luckily she can goes down for naps without nursing -but we do typically stay with her by the crib while she falls asleep. so we have yet to really teach her to fall asleep in the room by herself. any advise would be very much appreciated.

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• 58 rebecca seymour // Mar 3, 2009 at 9:13 am

  hi,my son is 2 n a half & up untill just after cchristmas he was a really good sleeper,bed at 7-7.30 sleeping through til 7am mostly without any night time problems then all of a sudden he started waking up within the first 4 hours screaming crying & thrashing around even running around his bedrooo,sometimes i could settle him back down & that would be it but slowly this has got worse now to the extent that he wont even go to sleep in his own room!I have tried slowly withdrawing myself but that had no effect & leaving him to cry for sort periods is not an option as it results in him being sick through distress!He no longer has a nap during the day (since just before his 2nd birthday)as even half hour naps keep him going til 10pm,also he has been in a junior bed since he was 1!I really dont know what to do,luckily i am a single parent so i dont have a partner to worry about but it is causing issues should i want to go out for the evening plus i live with my parents & this is affecting them as well,please help.

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• 59 Sharon // Mar 3, 2009 at 1:42 pm

  Hello! I have a 1 month old. I struggle with her waking in the middle of the night. I know that is to be expected at this age but I usually cannot figure out if she is hungry or just tired and woke herself. She will fall asleep with a bottle and I can put her down but when she doesn’t want that bottle I have to hold her until she falls asleep. This can take up to 3 hrs of a guessing game and going back and forth with a bottle (that only stays good for an hr) What can break this habit? I want her to fall asleep on her own at this age so that I don’t have issues later. Any suggestions to get a head start for sleeping all night? She goes about 3-4 hrs at a time with 4 oz of formula.

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• 60 Bree // Mar 3, 2009 at 8:46 pm

  I try and get my daughter (5mths) to self settle in her cot each sleep time. She works herself up into a hysterical state and I find I always end up rocking or feeding her to sleep to calm her down. I try and calm her in her cot before i pick her up but this often does not work. I put her in her cot when i see her tried signs and this makes no difference. I find the more i rock her o sleep the more she protests until i rock her - how do i get out of the vicious cycle.

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• 61 Karen // Mar 4, 2009 at 7:48 pm

  I have tried self settling my 4 month old son for about 4 weeks and it still isnt working hewill sleep for about hanlf an hour then start crying. then i try resetttling him for about 2 hours thenn he is due for his next feed. please help.

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• 62 kim // Mar 4, 2009 at 11:13 pm

  i need help with my 1 yr old, she never sleeps more than 3 hrs a span. what can i do

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• 63 wendy oneill // Mar 5, 2009 at 5:50 am

  I have read the sleep sense programme and begun it that night. Ollie my 9 month old son now goes down in his cot, half awake, between 6 and 6.30pm, whereas he used to be up until at least 11am lying in front of the television or crawling all over the place. We have our night times back and it is BLISS!!!! Thank you so much. However, a new problem has arisen since he started going down early. He usually wakes up around 1 hour after puttin him down and we let him cry it out then feed him, usually 9oz. This is great as we started getting sleep until around 3am but now over the past few nights he is wakening again at 11pm and 3am, both times for feeding. He then wakes up early as he is wet through (even though I change his nappy). How can I get him to go longer between bottles? Am i doing the programme wrong? Any advice would help.
  Regards

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• 64 Kaci // Mar 5, 2009 at 11:43 am

  My little angel’s name is Baylor. He is 2 1/2 years old and is the LOVE of my life. However at bedtime, we have some struggles. I try to get him down by 8:30, 9:00 p.m. In order to get him to sleep, I have to take him upstairs to OUR bed, lay down with him and let him run his fingers through my hair. From the time he was 4 months old, that is how he falls asleep…. playing with mommy’s hair. So after he finally goes to sleep, we quietly take him and put him down in his toddler bed. Every night, like clockwork, he is up around 11:30 or 12:00 coming to the side of our bed wanting in. If he is put back in his bed & does get back to sleep (playing with my hair of course) 30-45 mins. later he is up again and this goes on and on. As many times as I can handle….. until I just give in and let him climb in bed with us. It breaks my heart to think of him in his bed crying and really just wanting to be with us. I dont want this to tramatize him or make him afraid. I just want to do this the right way. Can you help me?? And my little Punkin??

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• 65 Maria // Mar 5, 2009 at 11:32 pm

  My 3mth old girl will only sleep fall asleep while breastfeeding and will only sleep next to me on my bed. She will not fall asleep on her own in her crib. How can I start the transition to get her to sleep on her own? Her daytime naps only happen if I go out with her in her carseat or stroller. Any suggestions as I am very sleep deprived and need to get her onto a schedule. She is averaging on sleeping an average of 8hrs a night…which is not enough. She wakes up to feed still every 2-3hrs.

  Thanks
  Maria

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• 66 Amanda // Mar 7, 2009 at 10:12 am

  My son just turned 6 a couple weeks ago, he has awful sleep habits and our pediatrician suggested melatonin to help him fall asleep at night. It has worked great, but he’s been on it for almost 2 years now, and I want to get rid of the crutch it has caused. We have tried EVERYTHING to get him to fall asleep on his own at night, but he’s just “not tired” as he puts it. He doesn’t even shoe signs of being tired either, he’ll play nonstop until 3 or 4 in the morning, and just fall asleep within 10 seconds, then he’s up at 6 ready to do it all again. He does suffer from night terrors, but he claims to remember them in the morning, telling me I was there and I let them hurt him. But we can’t wake him up from them, no matter how hard we try, neither non painful nor painful stimuli will awaken him. He just has to cry and scream it out. The are getting less and less, but he’s 6, and has had them since he was 2, at least once a week. PLEASE HELP!

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• 67 Aasma // Mar 8, 2009 at 12:32 am

  My 20 weeks daughter sleeps between 10:00 pm- 11 pm till 09:00 am -10 . She wakes up 1- 2 time during night. Secondly she sleeps while feeding and when she wakes up during night I have to feed her to get her back to sleep. (brestfeed). I want het to sleep at 08:00 pm and self-settle. Please help.

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• 68 Kelly // Mar 8, 2009 at 10:29 am

  I have 23 month old twin boys. Up until 3 days ago, they were perfect sleepers! Reading through your philosophies, this is very much how I treat my children and this is why they were great sleepers! Yeah!! They napped every afternoon from 1:30- to about 3:30 or 4 and went to sleep ALL night, every night on their own from about 7:15pm to 7am. Never have they gotten up in the night nor had problems sleeping. I will now explain my problem. As I’ve said before, I have perfect sleepers and this is just an issue that has come up and I don’t know what to do.

  My husband and I went on vacation for 5 days!! Since then, nothing has been the same! My parents came to our house to watch the boys for us. One evening as my mom was putting Cole’s pajamas on, Cael threw up in front of him the living room. This terrified Cole and Mom said he was practically inconsolable. After the boys were calmed down and cleaned up, Mom and Dad put them to bed as usual. A few minutes later, Cole was again hysterical, this time cowering in the corner of his crib crying for me. Cael had thrown up again. Well, since this all happened, Cole WILL NOT stay in his crib. It appears that he is terrified of it. The second he’s put in it, he climbs right out screaming and crying. I can get him to sleep at night pretty easily by lying in the doorway of their room. He knows I am there and is fine. But, he’s been waking in the night religiously at about midnight and 5am. He climbs out of his crib and calls and cries for me at the gate to their room. I go in there, put him back in bed, and lay on the floor till he falls back asleep (usually only takes about 10min). This is working but I am doing something I said I would NEVER do! I feel like I am catering to him!! But, I am trying to decide if this is a discipline issue or if he has been “traumatized” by Cael being sick and me being gone. But, if I am lying in there so he falls asleep, am I creating dependence?

  As for afternoon nap, it has been horrible. Yesterday I put him back in his crib FORTY THREE times before he finally settled down enough to sleep for a half hour. Again, I had to sit in his room and he had settled down (or gotten tired of) climbing out of his crib. My poor baby has bruises all over his arm from climbing out! I am not sure what to do with him! Today at nap, I called my husband in tears because I was at my wit’s end. Cole was so tired and nothing I did would get him to settle down. He was screaming, crying, out of his crib for 2 hours! Finally, I tried just letting him cry in his room in the doorway at the gate, hoping he would fall asleep on the floor. Needless to say, it didn’t work and he had no nap. (I had put his twin in a pack n play in the guest room and he fell asleep for 2 hours as usual so at least I had one happy, napping child! Cael doesn’t appear to be affected by any of this. He is still fine sleeping)

  I have no problem transitioning Cole to a toddler bed but I don’t think this is the time or the problem. My gut is that I think he is paranoid that I am going to leave him again or something is going to happen that makes Cael feel bad and get sick again. Every once in a while he will make reference to Mommy and Daddy bye bye in an airplane and back and Nana and Papa gone home. I think he may be scared I am going to leave him again. Is this a phase that will pass? Until then, how do I deal with this without creating dependence or new “bad” sleeping habits?

  I have been so spoiled with good, consistent nappers that this is totally ruining everything…and me!

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• 69 Tammy Thompson // Mar 13, 2009 at 2:17 pm

  Hi Dana,

  My daughter is 20 months old and has been falling asleep unaided for most of her life. She generally sleeps 10 hours at night and takes 1 2hr nap in the middle of the day. lately however, she has been refusing to nap. I’ll put her in her crib and she just fusses or plays with her bear and doll for over an hour. I’ve tried taking bear and the baby away but then she just cries for an hour. I know she must need to take a nap. But I am at wits end as to how to make her sleep if she doesn’t want to. And she is tired and grumpy for the rest of the day. Please help!

  Tammy

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• 70 Angela Shaw // Mar 13, 2009 at 4:19 pm

  Hi Dana,

  I have a 9.5 month old who has been a great sleeper since 6 weeks old. She sleeps 12 hours at night and takes 2 two-hour naps a day. We put her to down awake at the same time every night and for her naps each day; she “whine’s” herself to sleep unassisted. She recently learned to pull herself up in her crib, since this new discovery, when we put her down for her nap, she stands up and “talks” to her self and then cries instead of laying down to go to sleep. Please help!

  Angela

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• 71 Ingrid // Mar 16, 2009 at 4:12 am

  Hi,
  I have purchased your sleep sense program, and wonder if I am the only mother in the world with a problem like mine.
  My son is 2 years 3 months old. We moved house 7 months ago, and due to circumstances he was moved into a big boys bed then (regret that now - hindsight and since the move he takes between 30 mins (on a very good night) and 2.5 hours to go to sleep. BUT he’s happy. He gets out of bed constantly and plays in his room or reads books. He is great at playing in his bed as well. It’s not a matter or upset boy, it’s a matter of tired boy the next day. After 7 months of this stress, and trying; rapid return, behavioural techniques, getting my cross finger out and shaking it, I feel like I have tried most logical methods. So we purchased your program. It sounds great, but I don’t relate to 99% of it, as it sounds like it’s focused on dealing with upset children. For example I am trying the sit in method, when he gets out of bed and I give him the warning, next time, I leave the room, as recommended, he rejoices because he gets to play for 5 mins, there are no tears! After 5 mins I go back in, he has a book, and is happily sitting on his bed reading, when he see’s me, he throws the book away, like he thinks I won’t realise he was reading it or that the thud on the floor was caused by an abandoned book. It’s frustrating, because he isn’t bothered. It feels like it would be much easier to deal with if he was upset about bed time, rather than playful.
  Have I missed something in the program that would help me?
  thanks Ingrid from New Zealand.

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• 72 Suzanne // Mar 16, 2009 at 6:39 pm

  Hi Dana,

  My daughter Katie is almost 19 months old. She goes to sleep on her own, without any protest, and naps well during the day (about 3 hours). She normally goes to bed between 7 and 7:30 and wakes up between 6 and 6:30. For the most part, sleep training did wonders for us. But since her first birthday, she’s been crying in the middle of the night. She doesn’t wake up, she just cries. At first, it was only for a few seconds, once or twice a night. Now, at almost 19 months, she can cry for 10-20 min in her sleep, still normally once or twice a night. Unless she’s very distressed, I normally let her get through it, but I am wondering if there is more that I can do. Is this a night terror or a nightmare? And either way, is there anything I can do to help her through this? Also, when can I expect her to outgrow this habit? I have another baby on the way, and would be must happier knowing that Katie wouldn’t also be waking me at night!

  Thanks so much,
  Suzanne

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• 73 Tonette // Mar 17, 2009 at 2:30 pm

  I have a 5 month old son and a 2 1/2 year old little girl. My daughter has recently decided to be non interested in naps, going from a 2-3 hour nap to 0. But goes to bed around 8pm and sleeps until 830 or so. But she stills sleeps in our bed. My son will only sleep in his crib, but still wakes up every 2 hours to eat. The dr. gave me the same advice that you have mentioned about bottle, bath, book sleep…which I do. But his tummy is growling in the night and it just seems to me that he is hungry. Although he weighs 19 pounds!! I am one tired mommy.
  Any advice?

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• 74 Kristine // Mar 21, 2009 at 8:23 pm

  I have a 6 month old girl and she was a very good sleeper and I think she started to wake up because of teething. I put her to sleep by nursing and when she did wake up in the middle of the night I feed her thinking that she is hungry. She keeps waking up 2-4 times a night and when she does I try to wait to see if she is really hungry. She will cry when she wakes up. I try to comfort her with words or patt her saying that things are okay. But she keeps crying… So what I do is that I hold her in my arms and she will stop crying. I put her back down after few seconds and lay down with her. She would play for a little and falls back to sleep, but then after few minutes she would cry again until I feed her. I do not give her bath before she goes to sleep because when she was little she used to cry when I gave her bath before she went to bed so I moved the bath time during the day.
  I tried to not feed her during the night, but I taught her that feeding and sleeping goes together… TT I would not stay awake when I was feeding her when she was younger… So I gave up and she is so big I feed her lying down together… So we have the crib right besied our bed connected together…
  Could you please help me???

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• 75 Yvonne // Mar 30, 2009 at 9:40 am

  My frequently wakes up crying and inconsolable saying that some part of his body hurts, usually a leg or a foot. Once it was both legs. It does not seem like it is a charley horse, but I ask him to stand anyway, that doesn’t seem to help. It usually lasts about two hours and it is very hard to get him back to sleep. I have no idea if it’s in his head or real. What should I do?

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• 76 shane // Apr 5, 2009 at 8:49 am

  I am a big believer in the fact that if the child is sleeping too warm will bring on a night terror. I have a 15 year old and now an 18 month old and pattern is very similar. Usually within the first 2 hours of going to bed they start screaming with a blank look, looking straight past you etc. the other common factor was they both would be sweating alot. When my 15 year old used to do it I had to go in after the 1st hour and remove the quilt off her feet to regulate her warmth, our 18 month old now has a fan not directed on her but just to circulate the air better, this seems to have helped enormously. Warm in my opinion is the main factor, I also had night terrors as a child and wonder if it is a genetic thing too.

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• 77 Natasa // Apr 7, 2009 at 11:12 am

  Hi,
  My son is 2 years and 8 months. He used to be a good sleeper, always settled himself to sleep after a nice evening routine and didn’t wake up until about 6.30am. About 1.5 months ago he was in hospital because he needed to take IV antibiotics. He was not in pain nor did he have to stay in bed so he could play during the day. We were there with him - me during the day and my husband (his dad) during the night (as we have a 6 months old baby so I couldn’t stay overnight). Since he returned from the hosp he is waking up 3-4 times a night crying. Sometimes it looks like he is having nightmares, other times he just wants water, a teddy, a cuddle, etc. So we think he just wants attention and we try to ignore when he starts crying during the night. But he gets to the state that he goes out of his room and then we return him back to bed trying to be very boring, don’t talk or give him any special attention. We’ve even tried your method of taking his favourite cushion and only returning it when he goes back to bed and stops crying. However, he is still waking up calling us or crying very much (even though after we come to his room and say all is ok he settles back to sleep by himself). He knows numbers already and knows that he needs to stay in bed until 6.40am because any other number before that is still night… He is not having regular afternoon naps any more even though he still goes to his room to have a rest at least.
  Please help what we could do to stop his night waking and crying.
  Thanks.

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• 78 Becky // May 20, 2009 at 3:47 pm

  hi dana

  My son is 4 months old. He has a bed time routine(play, bath, eat, bed) he has 2-3 naps a day, ranging from 1 an1/2 hrs to 3. we start his routine at 7 and bed time is 8-9 o’clock. i even have some herbal cream that i rub under his nose( the smell would put anyone to sleep). he eats 2tsp of cereal and 8 ozs of formula before bed, fully burped but i give him a little bit of gripe water because its extremely hard to get them out if he is sleepy. with all this he still will only sleep 3-4hrs at a shot. when i give him his bottle at night he will only eat an oz or two before he goes back to sleep.(this im assuming is where he needs to learn the self sooth). but i have noticed that while he is a sleep he moans and wimpers, some times even breaking out in to a full out scream( something like when older kids are having nightmares or terrors) what could be causing this? i have started to play soothing music, it seems to help a little. is there anything a can do or change? please help.

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