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Hi! I’m Dana Obleman, creator of The Sleep Sense Program. If you’d rather read than watch, I’ve transcribed the text of this video below.
This week’s question comes from Mindy:
“My child has just recently gotten over the flu and an ear infection. Since then, he will not sleep through the night. This has been going on for about a month now. He seems like he is waking up every hour. What should I do?”
That is a good question Mindy. As I was reading through and looking at some of the comments, I saw quite a few people writing in with the exact same question. I am going to assume that your child was a good sleeper before the illness much like many of the other questions I saw. The child was sleeping through the night, got sick for a week or two and now things have really fallen off the tracks.
The good news is if you had a child, who was sleeping well through the night and had his or her own skills for sleeping then getting him back on the right track isn’t going to be as hard as you think because that knowledge is already there.
One of the things that people do when a child is sick is they will often bring their baby to bed with them and I understand the concerns especially in this cold and flu season that we’re having right now, which leaves you anxious about a sick child and how he or she is going to cope through the night. My advice is always that it is much better if you move to your child’s room rather than moving your child to yours.
A night or two in your child’s room is going to be a bit disruptive to your sleep but when the illness has subsided then you can go back to your bed and nothing much has changed. If you start bringing a baby into bed with you, it only takes a couple of nights and the baby might decide, “Wow! This is pretty awesome; I actually like sleeping in this bed so I’m going to start demanding that this happen every night.”
Even when the illness is over and the child is feeling well again, there still might be that demand to come to bed with you. What should have been just a few nights is now a month or more of a child either starting the night in your bed or coming to your bed halfway through the night.
Move to your child’s room rather than move your child to yours. Try to have consistency even around illnesses. I hear the same thing about teething. With teething, all you can do is provide a little bit of pain medication such as, Baby Advil or discuss with your doctor some options for monitoring the pain. However, if you start changing the way you respond to your child with every sickness or with every bout of teething then you are potentially running the risk of having to do this every month or every other month; you can quickly undo all the hard work you have put in to establish good sleep habits.
Many children will resist that you mess around with their sleep skills. They might accept some comfort meaning you could go in, have a cuddle, wipe noses, give a drink of water, or whatever the case, then put the child back in their crib, and most babies will accept that. They will be happy with the cuddle but then they will be looking for their own bed again to go to sleep. Increasing your comfort level is fine but definitely, do not wait 5 or 10 minutes and see if it is just going to pass.
If you know your child is sick, you can almost guarantee that there is going to be night awakenings. Even as adults when we are ill, there are usually quite a few more night awakenings and sleep is just harder. Anticipate some wake-ups, know that it is going to be a rougher night than normal, go in and offer a comfort but do not do anything drastic unless your doctor has suggested that you feed in the night. If your child is running a high fever, they will often suggest some fluids in the night.
I’d prefer you go to water first rather than an actual feed just because again, a couple of nights of night feeding and you could find yourself in this vicious cycle and a month or two later, you are still up for night feedings.
However, if that has been suggested then you should do it. Just be cautious that a couple of nights do not turn in to too many and ruin everything. If anything goes past three nights, the third night can be a trendsetter and then the child is waking up every other night looking for the same thing.
Here are a few things to keep in mind about sickness. Once the illness is over and the child is well again, do not worry if you had to backslide a little or things have not progressed the way you wanted. You can just start over and get your child back on track with falling asleep independently at bedtime and encouraging him to sleep through the night and not coming to your bed or whatever the case maybe. It might take a night or two of retraining but the foundation is already there and his sleep skills are already established, it’s just a gentle reminder that, “Okay, you are feeling better now and it is time to go back to this way.” It does not usually take more than a couple of nights.
I hope that gives you some guidance Mindy. Thanks for your question and sleep well!
To learn more about The Sleep Sense Program, click here — or you can click here to order now!
To ask a question about your child’s sleep, just leave it in the ‘Comments’ section below! I’ll choose one and create a new video answer each week!
Hi Dana,
Can you help me please.
My daughter is now 11 months and only ever slept throught the night twice.
She has a pacifier and has night feeds when she wakes as she screams uncontrolably.
Can you advise please.
Thanks
She does have a pacifier and will wake upto 5
My 6 month old goes to sleep by himself every evening and every nap time – he’s always awake when he goes into his cot and gets himself to sleep by sucking his thumb. However, recently he’s started waking up more and more in the night and crying relentlessly. He is teething, so I deal with that but he seems to get himself so worked up that he can’t sooth himself back to sleep…what’s the best way to help him (and us!) go back to getting a full night’s sleep?
my 2 year old daughter has never had a problem sleeping before shes gotten to where she wont take naps in the afternoon which is fine with us but last night she stayed up all night wanting to watch tv or play with her toys , she finally went to sleep about 6:30 this morning ,should i be worried that she did this ? im not sure what to do .
My 12 months old son still doesn’t sleep through the night. He’ll cry out 2 -3 times per night. Once he finds his pacifier, he’ll be fine. we are trying to wean him off the pacifier but it seems like he will not fall asleep without it and he’ll cry out middle of the night until he gets it. How can I correct this situation so everyone can have a good night sleep?
I have a 23 month old son who has never been a good sleeper. I was co sleeping with him until recently as I am 30w pregnant and its just to uncompfortable for me. My husband and I have recently got him into a “big boy bed” BUT my son always need one of us in his room to sleep. I still sing him to sleep nightly as I have tried crying it out and I just can not do it. He wakes up 2-10 times a night; he is just so random we never know what to expect. He always needs one of us to put him back to sleep and most nights we end up sleeping on the floor beside his bed as he will NOT let us leave the room. None of us have had a proper sleep in weeks and it is taking a toll on all of us. Can you give me any tips on giving him skills to fall asleep by himself when he wakes up at night.
I can’t get my child to sleep through the night. He is 3 now and every night I am hauling him back to his own room and bed! I just started a “reward chart” but not sure that is going to work either! What else can I do? Is locking his door at night wrong so I or my husband don’t have to get up with him 3 or 4 times a night?
My 11 month old son is having a hard time staying asleep once he falls asleep- both during nap time and bed time. For example, during a nap, he’ll usually wake up 45 mins later. If I hold him he’ll go back to sleep for another 45-60 minutes. If I don’t, he won’t go back to sleep. How do I help him get a well- rested nap time siesta?
My 5 month old daughter used to be a great sleeper. Put her down and she’d put herself to sleep. At 4.5 months the two bottom teeth came in and from about 4 months she is WIRED wide awake and barely sleeps for 30mins during the day and is still awake at 9pm at night. On our GP/Natropath’s advice we have given her sleep tonic and phenergan. Nothing seems to work. She becomes so tired but still doesn’t sleep and we cannot leave her to settle herself as she has no ‘off’ switch and just screams herself into a frenzy. She has also started crawling early so she just crawls and rolls all around the cot. It’s ridiculous. Do you have any advice? Katie
We have using your program for a month now. My 5 month old continues to wake up at night. We let him cry for awhile but he will cry for over a half hour if we let him sometimes even an hour only to wake up an hour or 2 later. We put him down awake and he falls alseep well, but he continues to awaken. He also takes good naps during the day. How are we suppose to deal with the night wakings that continue to happen night after night?
Hi Dana,
My 2 year old daughter is having a hard time settling down to sleep at night. I stopped breast feeding before bed about a month ago and it seems like no matter how tired she is she takes at least 45 minutes to go to sleep. I sit in the room to help her feel at ease but it doesn’t seem to be working, she asks for books or nuk, or doll but then gives them back, she doesn’t use them to help settle herself. She just started climbling out of her crib after naps so I worry of the implications when she does not want to go to bed and we have her in a toddler bed! She also doesn’t stay in her crib through the night when she wakes I bring her into my bed which I now would like to start changing as well. What is the best way to help her settle into bed more independently at night and then what to do to get her used to staying in her room all night?
Thank you for your advice and time, your input has been very useful to us!
Best regards
The Romersa Family
Hi I need help! My little one was a great sleeper but she has just turned 8 months and now takes ages to go to sleep at night as she keeps rolling onto her tummy and messing about, she then gets upset because she is tired. She can’t seem to roll back on her own in bed as she does on the play mat etc. We put her down at 7pm as always and she can still be messing at 10pm. She then sleeps longer into the morning and puts out her routine for the rest of the day. Then she is over tired as we have to wake her for lunch and dinner after naps, and then wont settle again for bed. we are in a bad circle and need advice on how to stop or deal with the rolling.
My 10 month old has coslept since she was born and we are now trying to transition her to her crib because she is crawling and she doesnt sleep well anymore. I have tried to put her in there for naps and bedtime and its almost like shes scared to death to be in there. I have tried to let her cry and check on her every 15 min. She won’t fall asleep while I am in there she just cries until I give in. What can I do?
My daughter is 14 months. She slept in her own bed but in my room until she was 12 months. Now she is in her room and she wakes up 3 – 4 times at night. When she wakes up the only way she falls back to sleep is by me sitting inside the crib with her. She doesn’t have to be on me or touching me. She just needs to know that I’m there. I’ve tried giving her a hug and kiss and letting her know she needs to sleep on her own and then leaving the room. However, she gets so upset that she throws herself back and hits her head on the crib and will continuously do this until I go back in. I’m afraid she might hurt herself if I let her cry to long. What should I do?
hey carolina is still not sleeping through the night she is a year old and its like i never get sleep. Now she is sick and she has a cough. She is waking up during the night and coughing they say that i cant give her anything to help her. Do you no of anything i can do to help her with the cough and sleeping.
Dear Dana:
My daughter is 5 months old. She used to have a really good sleep schedual but lately she seem not to want to go to bed. How do I get her to fall asleep by herself, she seems to rely on me to rock her to sleep and I don’t want her to get in that habit of needing me for her to fall asleep unless all babies do that. But lately she does not fall asleep til like 12 am 1230 am and all she wants to do is play and when i try to get her to go to sleep she screams her head off. what can i do to calm her, I have tried baths, I was giving her cereal at night but I didnt last night i gave her just a bottle she went to bed at like 1030 but that is still late.
I have a 1.5 yr old and a 3+ yr old who SHARE a room. Both girls are on a set bed time routine, both girls fall asleep great by themselves…however, anywhere between 3-4 am (sometimes earlier) my 1.5 yr old wakes up, is fussy (usually needs a diaper change (even though she stops getting liquids around 6:30pm)) after the diaper change she settles back down, falls asleep (almost)…then wakes up about 15-20 min. later SCREAMING…and flopping around like a fish out of water. This happens even when she is NOT ill, teething, feverish, etc. It is as if she works herself up to the point she can’t calm down. My husband has better luck calming her down then me, but even so, the up and down, screaming, last anywhere from 1.5 to 2+ hours… Help, Any suggestions??
Hi Dana — my husband actually did subscribe to your programme and we have definitely made progress (no more pacifier, no more patting or cuddling her to sleep). We never used to give her a bottle in the crib at all, until she had a series of illnesses– almost 3 months of flu, colds, respiratory infection, and then on top of it, teething– and we did give her the bottle and sippy cup in her crib. Now of course she has it every night and wakes up asking for a drink or a bottle every night. I’ve read your blog regularly and find it really helpful and reassuring. It’s nice to get the reassurance that we can get through the protests to a child that sleeps well without props. And we will get through cutting out the bottle and sippy cup– using your programme. My question is more to do with night-time wakings when you share a bedroom with your child. Due to financial constraints, we live in a one-bedroom flat. So when our child wakes up, she knows we are there. We are invariably woken up by her calling for us. Would you suggest we leave the room the way we do when she goes down at night?
Thanks and thanks to everyone here for their candour in talking about what is happening for them. It can feel awfully lonely at 3 am when my child wakes up (again) and all I can think is how I’m not parenting her right!!!
Hi, do you have advice on teaching good sleep habit for my 3 weeks old son (born on 2nd Jan 10), especially for taking nap without being cuddled ? What is standard time for infant (less than 3 months) to nap and sleep at nite? I usually start bed time routine around 5.30-6 pm (warm bath, baby massage, and breastfeed) and put him to bed around 7-8 pm. Thanks in advance.
My son is 5 months old and he just doesn’t stay asleep. I have to rock him to sleep and when i go to put him down in his crib he wakes up! Its a headache but I just give up and have him lay with me in bed…. I need help to find a way to get him to sleep longer and in his bed??? Any ideas?
I have a 15mo. old son. I was just recently able to have him start sleeping in his own bed (he will only sleep in the toddler bed). I used to nurse him back to sleep while he was laying next to me. Last week I started to stop nursing him to sleep. He was also teething (molars) so, I rocked him and rested my head next to him until he fell asleep. Now that his pain has lessened he is still waking up a lot. He will sleep for 3 hrs. then wake up every hour and I will just rock him back to sleep. He will just cry and cry until I do so. I am so tired that I have been letting him sleep next to me and, I end up nursing him. It doesn’t help that he sleeps so much better laying next to me. Any advice?
my 17month old son will scream for hours before falling asleep he has a bath then a bottle then i put him up to bed awake at 7.30 and he will scream until 11 o clock or later i have been doing this for months, i just cant get him into a routine for bed.he also wakes up through the night at least for times or more and screams and nothing consoles him until hes cried that much he falls asleep,hes up between 5 or 6 am in the morning he does have a nap in the day from 12 till 1.we have tried everything but nothing works.
My son is 9 months old and we decided to start this program last weekend. He usually has no problem going to bed it’s when he wakes up to feed is the problem. Well when he woke up after sleeping for 3 hrs, we started off with checking on him every 5 minutes. I did this for solid hr and he never let up crying once. At this point I didn’t know what I was supposed to do b/c it had been an hr so I nursed him. I was very frustrated at this point b/c I had given into him and felt like a failure. Well again when he woke up at 3am I let him cry 10min before I went in the room. Then I just layed there and waited for him to fall asleep. Sometimes I stayed in the room for 20 min and then there were other times I went back into my room. Again he cried nonstop for an hr and so I felt like he was hungry. So my question is what am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to let him cry longer than that and just never feed him? It’s hard to believe that he’s hungry b/c he eats so well during the day but when I do nurse him in the night, he takes a full feeding. What do you think?
My 18 month old is sleeping through the night, but he won’t go into his crib unless he is absolutely passed out – I then can place him in there and he’ll stay alseep. However, he goes down for his nap 1/2 asleep and then falls asleep on his own. Why does he pop up screaming at night if I place him in before he is in a deep sleep? (he then sleeps 12-14 hrs)
My son is 27 months, and needs me to sleep by his side and go to bed when he does in order to fall asleep. As soon as I sneak out to go back downstairs with his dad, he wakes and yells for me at the top of the stairs. He will cry till I come back to his side. He also wakes around 3,4or 5 wanting milk or juice and will not stop the request to return to sleep. He is also very clingy, I dont do anything without him. He has been right beside me since birth when it comes to everyday activities. The sleeping has gone on for nearly 6 months and I am tired…Please help!
Hi
My 2 year old son has been going down to sleep all on his own, no crying up until recently. While it use to sometimes take him 20 minutes to fall asleep – he was only babbling to himself – no crying. All of the sudden last week he started crying at bedtime – I really can’t say anything was different – no sickness, same routine with daycare, eating etc. Now he cries every night at bedtime and it take a good hour (with me going in 4 or 5 times just to say “go night night” make sure nothing is wrong). Some of my friends have suggested he is just asserting himself and going through a testing-me-phase. What do I do? I miss my good little sleeper….
Marina
I have a four year old who does not like to sleep at night. She is up all night and wants to sleep all day. I have tried waking her up early in the day and when I think she is going to bed she is just taking a nap. Any suggestions would greatly be appreciated!!!!!
Why might my child sleep 6 hours straight one night, and the next night, not sleep more than 2 hours at a time? Also, since he does sleep for 6 hours, doesn’t that mean that he has the skills needed to go/stay asleep? So, why then does he not sleep 10-12 hours straight?
i have the same issue with my 6 mth old girl.i’ve recently asked the same question no reply so far! i would think they would be waking and putting themselves back to sleep, but why some nights and not others?! confused. good luck
My 9 month old is the same way. There are some nights when he’ll go to sleep easily on his own and some nights when he will only fall asleep nursing, some nights that he’ll wake up once and some nights that he’s up every two hours. If they have the skills to fall asleep on their own, why do we still have the night wakings?
Hi, I don’t know if it is relevant but I have found that if I put my 7.5 month old babies to sleep when they are already over-tired they will tend to wake during the night and wake earlier in the morning. On the nights when I get them to bed earlier before they are over-tired, they have a much better sleep.
I have the same question. Every night is different and he falls asleep on his own at about the same time. We never know what kind of night to expect. He isn’t overtired when he goes to sleep either. If you figure it out please let us know.
Please help. My son is 2 and I just switched him to toddler bed b/c he climbs out of his crib. Every night for the past week, he’s been running out of his crib and demanding to sleep on the living room floor. I put him back in his room and agree to lay with him till he falls asleep and that only worked once. The other nights, it took him till 11 pm to fall asleep b/c he kept protesting to sleep in the living room. I did give it to it b/c I was so exhausted and I wanted him to get sleep too. He naps fine on his own at daycare and for everyone else except me. Please help. Thanks!
For the last 3-4 months, our 13 month old has woken up between 4-5 am. We usually gave her a bottle in her crib and let her fall back to sleep. Following a series of colds, we decided to “tough love” her and let her cry it out at night. We’ve had mixed results. She’ll either sleep through the night or scream as if she is in tremendous pain. To a point where she’s so upset she won’t take a bottle. With several more weeks of cold season ahead, how do you suggest we help her sleep from 6:30-7:00 PM to 7:00 AM?
Many thanks!
Booker
My 2 1/2 year old daughter has slept by herself since 6 months of age. She sleeps through the night. Last week, she decided that every time we lat her down, shut the door as usual, she comes crying out of the room. We try to take her back and close the door again and she comes back out crying. She clings to us tightly. She used to not even get out of the bed till we came in the room. Now I have been sleeping on the floor next to her bed till she falls asleep, then I go to my room. Is there something I should know, can you help.
My son is 8 months old and has two naps a day. 8am and 1pm. His bedtime is 7:00pm and he wakes up at 5:30/6:00am. I was wondering if i need to change his bedtime because lately he has been so tired that he has been napping at 11am too. I try to keep him up but he is just so tired. What should i do?
Hi, I have 7.5 month old twins who have a very similar routine to your little one. The same thing kinda happened with me so I started to push their 1st nap a little later by about 15mins at first and then by half an hour and now their first nap is at 9am after waking at 6am, by this time they are pretty tired and really looking forward to this nap. They sleep for about 1.5 to 2 hours. Their 2nd nap is between 1.30 and 2pm and again they sleep for about 1.5 hours. I have cut out their nana nap in the late afternoon and have found they start to get pretty tired at about 5.30pm. I start their bedtime routine no later than 6.30pm and they are asleep by 7pm. I am thinking that perhaps I need to start their bedtime routine at 6pm so they are asleep by 6.30pm because it seems that they are too tired and cranky after that. So maybe try putting your little one to sleep for the night a bit earlier. Hope it helps.
Are there specific guidelines to help your infant (less than 8 weeks old) sleep through the night?
hi,
i read and watch your emails often but i cant seem to change my five month daughters habit of drinking 90 mls per feed every two hours consistently throughout the day and night. she wakes up at least four times in the night for a feed and falls straight to sleep when feeding is finished. i also give her solids in the afternoon
which i thought might help with feeling more full for longer.i thought this would help her drink more which would hopefully make her have less feeds and sleep longer. i did seek advice from my doctor regarding this but none of it seems to help.
i kindly await your reply
ambia
I really don’t know what else to do. I have over the past months tried substituting my 14 month old bottle for water or tea in the nights, but she constantly refuses it. She gets up at least every hour for her feed. I try to put her to bed by 8:00pm, after giving her a nice bath and singing to her. She is very active and at times, she doesn’t go to bed until 10:00pm. What am I doing wrong?
Forgot to mention he has the same routine everynight as described in your routine bath, teeth, milk,story, bed
Hi my son Joel us to sleep through every night but the last 3 weeks he has been waking up 2/3 sometimes 4 times a night and wanting my wife to sit with him till he goes back to sleep. He’s 3 years old and my wife is currently 25 weeks pregnant and she’s a a person who needs at least 8 hours sleep even when she’s nt pregnant, as you can imagine she is shattered and wheni try and get up to give her a break Joel says he doesn’t want me and then gets upset so my wife gives in and leaves me feling guilty in bed!!! Is here an advice you could give us to try and get Joel sleeping thru the night again?? A tired husband of a more tired mum to be!
Hi, shorty we will go on holiday for 2 weeks with a 6 hours time zone difference. My 4 months old daughter (breastfed) can fall asleep on her own (for nap and nights) but does not yet stay asleep through the night . She wakes up approx 2-3 times crying and sometimes gets nursed back to sleep. Any suggestions on how I can manage the time zone/jet lag? Plan is that after holiday I want to stop the night feeds.
I have got my 2 year old baby into the habit of falling asleep himself, but he still wakes up at night time and sometimes even stay awake for more than one hour. Recently he even comes to our bed at night time when he wakes up. Why baby at this age still wake up at night time and what should I do to improve his sleep?
I have 8 month old twins. Most of the sleep advice and training are for singleton babies and just won’t work for twins. We do have a strick routine, including bedtime. They sleep in one room, so if they wake up at night, i can’t just leave them to fall asleep on their own. They start wiggling and chatting and will wake up the one that is sleeping. So this means that as soon as you hear a peep, we get up so we don’t have 2 awake babies. They are use to each other’s normal noices, but having you twin chatting and eventually screaming in your ear and waking you up, can lead to a very unhappy sister!
Hi, I also have 7.5 month old twins. I find Dana’s program really effective as she deals with twin, triplet issues also. One of my babies is regularly woken by his sister screaming but will eventually put himself back to sleep without much trouble, however, my daughter doesn’t settle as easily. I have been doing the program for 2 weeks now and have seen a great improvement. I am really impressed with Dana’s logical and loving techniques.
My baby is co-sleeping with my husband and I, and she falls asleep only while nursing.How do I teach her how to fall asleep on her own and sleep in her crib without crying it out? She’s almost 10 months old now.
I have a question. I have a 2 year old almost 3 year daughter. We have established a bedtime routine we started this on Dec 24th and have been doing it like the book says staying consistent we have bath, pj’s, brush teeth, one story, one song and prayer and kiss and into her crib. After I put her in I leave the room I had done the staying in the room option through the 10 days and then had started leaving the room. She climbs out of the crib and I put her back in and tell her it is time for night, night and then leave the room she climbs out again and this will usually last for an hour to an hour and a half every night. What can I do to get her to stay in her crib and to fall asleep sooner than an hour to an hour and half after I have put her to bed. Please Help.
We had this problem for awhile. I would suggest that when she gets out of her crib and you go to put her in, do not speak and do not make eye contact. Walk in, put her back in bed and walk out. Eventually this game will get too boring for her to continue.
My daughter Grace will be 2 1/2 next month and I would like to transition her from the crib to a “big girl” bed. We are expecting another baby in 4 months and would like Grace to be happily sleeping in her new bed. What is the best way to make this transition smooth for her?
Emilia had been sleeping through the night for the last 4 months and once she began teething everything changed. She wakes up in a frantic state every night and if we don’t tend to her she begins to vomit violently. This has been going on the for 3 weeks now and I’ve gone back to work and I can’t take the sleepless nights any more. How do I deal with this situation?
Hi, my 21 month-old won’t fall asleep unless he has a bottle of milk. He usually goes to bed around 8 to 9pm with a bottle, then he wakes up around 12am because he needs a nappy change. Then, he will demand another bottle to go back to sleep. If we don’t give him a bottle, he will cry for a long time, up to hours and throw out in his cot. We’ve tried letting him cries for a few nights but that doesn’t help. He has eczema and he will scratch himself and bleed. If we give him antihistamine for his eczema, which is supposed to help him sleep, he still wakes up after about 4 hours and won’t go back to sleep without his bottle. So he still gets his bottle. Then, he will wake up again around 4am and needs another nappy change and bottle. Is there anything that I can do to stop the bottle?
Thanks, Di
How much noise is too much when the baby is sleeping. Does the type of noise make a difference in how sound the baby sleeps? Are there any studies out there regarding how noises affect the child’s psyche.
My brother is getting married later on this year overseas. My concern with going is how my two children (2.5yrs & 15m…at the date of wedding) are going to cope with the 8 hr time difference and new locations for day naps? The youngest has never sleep anywhere but her own bed (always refused sleeping in the pram or arms if we were out and about) and the last time I took the eldest oversea…it took him 2 months to get back on track with his sleep. What can I do to minimise the impact or is it just not worth it? Neither are terrible sleepers. The youngest fights it a bit and refuses to drop her final night feed, but most nights quickly puts her self to sleep with little or no help.
My 6 month old has slept through the night since she was 3 month old but within the last month she has started to wake up during the night. We can get her to bed around 8 every night but by 10 she is wide awake and wont go back to bed. Once she finally gets back to bed almost an hour later, she wakes up atleast every hour crying (with her eyes closed). What can i do to help her? She was such a great sleeper and then all of the sudden she has started waking up. I just dont know what to do but i cant continue to do this every night, its exhausting…help!
My daugheter is 9 months old and has been teething since 4 months old. She has 9 teeth, the latest was a molar. She has NEVER slept a full night. I’m given her homeopathic teething tablets and she can fall asleep on her own but she wakes up and wails so bad that I have to comfort because my husband and i can’t take more than 5 minutes of her crying. We attempted to leave her in her crib when she wakes but she seems to “hate her crib.” So we have resorted to bringing her to bed. i know it’s not what should be done but we can’t tolerate the screaming baby. any advice?
My son wakes up at night (even if he happens to be in bed with me) and sits straight up and fusses and rolls and flops around. He sometimes can’t fall back to sleep easily even with me there, so I don’t think it’s a separation problem. He is very active during the day. Can this be a sleep disability problem?
i have another question . for some of you out there you may be as confused as me. i have a very active almost 7 mth old who would rather play than nap but i do get her down for 2 a day the length is always different.anyways, according to most experts 6-12 mth olds should have 2 naps a day …this is the kicker…1- 3 hrs long?! how do you really know what time frame your baby falls into that frame is quite vague
We went on vacation for 2 weeks where the time change is 3 hours ahead. It took her a few days but did sleep through the night while we were on holidays. Now that we’re back home, she’s very clingy when I try to put her down for her naps as well as for the night. I don’t understand what’s going on. Any ideas?
our 6 month old has had many good nights sleeping through no awakenings , but some nights she will be up a few hrs after we put her down or sometimes later in the night. my question is if she can manage an entire night(11 hrs) as she is probably waking up and putting herself back to sleep why does she often call for us on these other nights? she has been like this since 3 mths…confused
I have a 4yr old son & a 15month old daughter. My my 4yr old was never a great sleeper & we did all the wrong things such as bring him into our bed. It has taken us until recently to get him into his own bed although I do still have to lay with him for him to go off to sleep but for me this is nothing compared to what we used to do so I am ok with it. But now 15mth old who is still breast feeding is sleeping in our bed. She was the perfect baby & slept 10-12hrs at night maybe only waking once if any. She got sick when about 9mths old & hasn’t slept through the night since which has been exhausting! Now she is at that very determined age when I try to put her back to bed she doesn’t want to go. I have got a chair in her room to which I have had many uncomfortable & interupted nights but have still not found this to work. Any other ideas?
What do you do for a child who has mainly silent reflux and wakes coughing every 20-30 mins? How do you get a child in such discomfort to self soothe and settle themselves again? My son is 9 weeks and is sleeping and feeding poorly as a result of reflux. This isn’t a cold that will resolve in a matter of a week or so. We have the bed head elevated, he has been prescribed medication and has a dummy which is meant to help. We think we are doing all we can but it is heart breaking to seem him so distressed and unable to sleep. I know there’s a happy little boy in there somewhere if only he could get some sleep :o( Any advice?
Hi, Dana! Your advises are really, really helpfull!!!! thank you very much.
Hello
my son is 2 yrs 3 mnths old, he doesnt sleep untill 10 and wakes up 7 o clock in d morning, my main concern is when he is really sleepy head in the bedroom he does actions and talks to him self sometimes he does it with his eyes closed, strange thing is when he does it, he cant even see me sitting right in front of him looking at him and after few minutes he realises i am there and sometimes four or five o clock in the morning he sits up and starts talking and acting. i am really concerned as once i watched a programme about a girl who couldnt sleep and had sleeping disorder where she was doing acting and was talking to herself my son does exactly same thing. does it mean my son has got some problem?forgot to tell you he has one afternoon nap for 30 minutes to max of 1 hour .
please help! my son is 13 months old and is now sleeping through the night but his naps are a problem, he goes down in his cot and can take himself off to sleep but as soon as 30 minutes are up he wakes screaming but is still very tired and wont go back to sleep, ive tried leaving him in his cot for another 30 mins and go in every 5 then 10 minutes to sooth him but after 3 weeks we decided it just wasnt working! what can i do?
My son was sleeping well, going down to sleep for his naps during the day for 1 1/2 each and then sleeping almost through the night. However, now at around 5 months he is not sleeping well for his naps (only one nap cycle…40 mins) and then waking up. I try to let him fuss to go back to sleep but he won’t have any of it and I get him up until he goes to bed again. How can I encourage him to sleep longer and have less naps during the day.
Robin
HELP!! Ruby is nearly 24 months old, she usually sleeps all evening in her bed but when she wakes she is in my bed all night as I am too tired to do anything else. I breastfeed her to sleep every time she wakes which even in my bed can be up to 6 times in a night. She is very determined to have the milk. Her appetite is sometimes effected my all the milk and she often doesnt want her breakfast. She did sleep through when she was 5 months for a few weeks but when we came back from holiday she started waking in the night. During the day Ruby sometimes asks to feed I think if she is tired but doesnt ask if we are out all day. She is tired during the day because she is not getting enough sleep at night, sometimes she falls asleep too late in the day and is up all evening.
Hello,
My daughter is two and 1/2 and is a great sleeper, when she goes to bed. She is now in a regular bed but will not sleep alone. If I leave the room she screams for hours. I tried sitting on a chair but she just gets up and sits next to me over and over again. She does not fall alssep until close to 10pm. I tried everything, what can I do? Help
Hello Dana,
My daughter who is 16 months has recently started waking in the night after she wets her disposable diaper. Some nights it’s quite wet and others it’s only damp. She’s not hard to put back to sleep afterward but getting up once or twice a night to change her is becoming tiresome. My question is, should I be getting up to change her or should I be using my key phrases until she learns to sleep through it?
Hi Dana
Thank you for the information, I have taken lots of tips. I would now like to know if it is wrong to let Lilly go to sleep if we are next to her but not interacting with her?
My 9 month old has resisted all attempts and various methods to sleep train her. FRom her first night she has only ever slept if she is beside me or on top of me. She also will only fall asleep through breastfeeding and every time she wakes at night she requires to suckle, resulting in very broken sleep for myself. She will also not sleep in her cot, and before that her moses basket so she is in bed with me. The problem is the same during the day, though she will fall asleep moving in her buggy or in the car. We have tried various sleep methods including controlled crying for weeks on end and have never seen an improvement. She will stay awake in hysterics for 5 hours at a time, then fall ino a fitful sleep for 20 minutes before starting up the hysterics for another 3 or 4 hours etc. We have seen various sleep experts and tried less severe methods like staying in the room and rubbing her back for example, nothing has worked. Do you have any tips. Having seen the effects of control crying we are not fans of this method with our daughter. Thanks you from a desparate mother!
My 19 month old son is at the stage of trying our patience every time he gets the chance. He doesn’t listen to anything we say and although I wouldn’t say he is bad he is certainly trying to push is as far as he can. We say no and see always consistent but nothing seems to work at the moment. We are doing on holiday in July and would like for ollie to enjoy himself but also to know the boundaries. Any advice would be great. Many thanks
Wendy and Stuart
Hi! I have a 10 month old daughter who is waking every 2-3 hours wanting to be breastfed. She has never taken a bottle (I tried at least 10 different kinds), so I have nursed her from day one. For a while she was sleeping at least 6 hours, then up for 5-10 minutes to nurse, then back to sleep for 5 more hours. However, in the last month she’s waking every few hours. I don’t want to let her cry it out, but I also don’t want to be going through this for six more months. Please help!!
Hi: My 10-month old daughter used to sleep through the night (I used guidance from a book) for about 2 months but has been waking up 1-3 times a night over the past 2-3 months. It started with a cold, then I thought it was due to pain from teething, and then there was also peeing through her diaper/clothes. So, I started changing her when she woke up b/c I didn’t want her to be wet/cold as the months got colder, and then I also began feeding her a bottle when she woke up to help soothe her and b/c she wasn’t drinking as much during the day. Now, she is clearly expecting a bottle when she wakes up during the night–sometimes she is soaked but it just depends how long she’s been asleep. Her daily naps also aren’t as long as they used to be and when we bring her upstairs to her bedroom for a nap or nighttime, she often starts to whimper or cry. I appreciate your guidance on things I could try to re-teach her how to sleep well again. Thank you, Kelly
My 6 month old baby was diagnosed with colic and reflux (mostly silent). She is a light sleeper and could wake up to 15 times at night. during the day she would only take cat naps and sleep 2 or 3 times for about 10-20 min. Please help? She does use prescribed medication for the reflux and is on special formula and solids 3 times a day to try and keep the food down.
Thanks heaps
Emerentiana has her last feed at 22:30 . She is four months now. How do I go about getting eliminating this feed which I have to wake her up for. When I tried letting her sleep through she still wakes up in the night 2 or 3 times. Should I continue waking her for the 22:30 feed as she sleeps throiugh till 07:30 giving me a good rest. Will she begin to have less at the 22:30 feed naturally or should I cut dow the amount that she takes? She is being totally bottle fed by the way.
If the feeding helps you get a good rest then why change anything. She will eventually not need that feeding. She will let you know when she doesnt need it.
My 7 month old daughter was sleeping thorough the night until she was ill. she still settles herself to sleep but then wakes around 9pm every night and i am tyhen up and down until I give up around 11 and put her in bed with me. I have a 2.5 yr old as well so i need to get some sleep. I have tried letting her cry but its not working! ???
Help.. My recently 2 year old just wants to sleep on the floor in hos room! He’s had a lot of changes to deal with recently.. A recent move and split.. A move from cot to a bed and started nursery!! He takes over a hour to settle after he’s been put to bed at half 7 and ends up asleep on the floor by his door, bed cleared and sleeping on his duvet with teddys! Iv started to just let him sleep there now.. In hope that in a month or two he will suddenly want to sleep in his bed. I’m more concerened about his not settling when its bed time. He always did before. He also wakes at least twice in the night. But usually settles himself back off. I can’t find any relevent help on any other sites. Can you help me please?
Hello there,
My daughter doesn’t sleep, and hasn’t slept more than 12hrs a day total since birth! She’s now 7.5mo, and is the lightest sleeper I’ve ever seen in my entire life. If I so much as crack the door to check on her, she wakes up and stares straight at me. We live on a relatively quiet street, but it’s not like her room is soundproof, and even the wind will wake her up. Desensitizing her has not worked. Secondly, I put her to bed when she yawns and rubs her eyes, turn the lights off, and leave nothing in the crib besides a blanket, but she will still play for up to 1.5 hours in the dark until she falls asleep. The lack of sleep is starting to affect her mood during the day, but I don’t know how to make her sleep if she doesn’t want to. I’ve never heard of a baby with insomnia before….
Hello, Jillian is eating every 4 hours. Her first feeding is at 7 am – 11 am 3 pm 7 pm and 11pm. The last two nights she has been sleeping thru her 11 pm feeding. Therefore, she is up at 2 am to eat. Should I wake her at 11 pm to eat or let her sleep?
i had this when my son got to around five months, i decided to let him sleep through and eventually she will phase out that 2am feed….make a judgment about whether she even needs it at all? slowly reduce her milk by one ounce every couple of nights (or minutes if b/feeding) hope it helps!!! :-)
Hi,
My son is 2 yrs old and ever since he got sick last YEAR, he’s been sleeping with me. (I know, I know…) Now I’ve reestablished his routine, put “fun” bedding on his bed, given him a lovey, and explained that it’s time to sleep in his “big boy” bed. However, when it’s actually time to sleep (he’ll lay in his bed to hear a story) he pops up and runs from the room screaming and goes back to my bed. I have tried dragging him out and putting him back into his own room-the last time was over an hour of fighting,and he still ended up in my room in the middle of the night. How do I get him to sleep in his own bed if he won’t even stay in it long enough to tell him goodnight? Please help!
I have a 2 year old who is in the middle of what I think is his “terrible 2′s”.. He’s very rude, very mean and likes to hit and fight with other kids, just in general, has very bad manners for a 2 year old.. He is staying with a aunt during the day, so not at a daycare but I’m thinking he has developed some unacceptable behavior since he’s not being taught outside our home. I try my best to teach him but it has not gotten any better. What can I do?
I have an 8 month old girl and she will sleep for about three hours and then wake up every two after that. PLEASE HELP, I have tried everything.
My son is 9 years old and he will not fall asleep until after 9 pm which is usually 10 or 11 or 12 and he is in school and he hs warm milk at night is there anything you can tell me that might get him to fall asleep before 9pm
Hi
My son is 11 months and is starting to show a pattern of wanting to stay awake for much longer during the day. He usually has two naps and one is still not enough. I am trying two shorter naps but he has become so moody during the day now that I’m not sure what to do. If I leave him to sleep longer for the first nap he doesn’t go to sleep for his second nap until the time I’d normally wake him up from his second nap. So he ends up going to bed later. We also now have night wakings and lots of crying – what do I do?? Please help.
Hi Nikki,
my son is now 13 months, but at 10-11mths he was waking up through the night also so I thought he obviously wasnt tired enough and sleeping too much during the day, so I stopped 1 of his naps. I try to delay his only sleep until 12.30/1pm and he usually sleeps 2 hours or so, but ive found he does get narky late afternoon. I try and distract himas much as possible or take himfor a walk etc and come 6pm, he gets his last 8oz bottle and goes to bed at 7pm, and sleeps all night. This routine really works for me. Hope it might help you.
Hello,
My daughter who is 3 is getting up through out the night. We have established a bedtime routine early on (bath, pj’s,two stories and then in bed – this is all done upstairs and once we come upstairs to start the routine we don’t go back down) She gets up any where from 0 – 3 times a night. Most of the time I am not consistent with putting her back in her bed. I am doing this on my own b/c my husband doesn’t help!!(that is another story)ha ha So sometimes I am just so exhausted that it is easier for me to let her sleep in our bed when she wakes up, especially if this has been going on for a while. I guess my question to you is Why is she waking up in the night? and What can I do to make it stop?
Thanks
Michelle
My Daughter Amelia is almost four months old. She sleeps pretty well at night and we always try to put her to sleep awake. She just will not sleep for longer than 40 minutes at a time during the day. Some days I will be lucky if she has 1 hour and 40 minutes sleep and then is cranky at night. We have a bedtime routine set up of feed, bath at 6-6.30, top up and then bed between 7-7.30pm.
Dear Dana,
My 7 yrs old son cannot sleep on his own. He needs me by his side in order to fall asleep and in the middle of his sleep he wakes up and comes in our bed and finally none of us gets a high quality sleep. Could you please be more specific with your advises?
I am having the same issue with my 5 year old. It has literally been years since I have gotten a full nights sleep. I have tried all the advice given to me from online, parents, and doctor, and he is still waking up crying at least 3 times a night.?
It is starting to effect my everyday life, work, and my social life, the little one I do have.
Please help, or answer Leonandri’s question.
Thank you