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Hi! I’m Dana Obleman, creator of The Sleep Sense Program. If you’d rather read than watch, I’ve transcribed the text of this video below.
This week’s question is from Wendy. She writes:
“Ollie goes down half awake at 6:30PM and then wakes an hour later wanting a nine ounce bottle. He then used to sleep until 3AM — when he would have another bottle — but he is now waking up at 11PM too, wanting to eat every time. Then, he is waking up extra early in the morning because his diaper is soaked through! What can I do?”
Well Wendy, that is a lot of milk in the middle of the night. I’m assuming he has a bottle before bed and then another one an hour later and then two more in the middle of the night, which really is way too many.
If he is underweight and you have been advised by your Doctor that he should be eating in the night, or if he has any health concerns then by all means, continue with the feeds. However, if he is a healthy 9 month old there really is no reason that he needs bottles in the night.
There are a couple of things or sort of “red flags” that stand out to me in your message, but it also sounds like you have started to take some steps in the right direction as far as bedtime is concerned, which is great!
I am assuming that you do a nice routine with him before bed. If you are not including a feed in the bedtime routine, I would suggest that you put one in. For example, around 6PM Oley could have a bath and get his pajamas on. Next he could have a bottle (he needs to stay awake through that step) and then perhaps read a story together after that to help break the connection between eating and sleep. Lastly you would put him in his crib awake. It sounds like you’ve already taken some steps in the right direction and are already preventing him from fully falling asleep on the bottle.
While going into bed half awake seems a good step, half-awake can also mean being half asleep. For some babies, that is just not enough. Think of sleep as a journey and let’s use the bottle as an example. A baby might use the bottle to basically take them 80 percent of the way and then do the last 20% percent of the sleep journey on their own. What happens then, is that for every night waking they think they need you to come back to help do that first 80 percent of the journey again, so they can do the last 20 percent to fall back asleep.
It sounds to me like Oley might still have that association between the bottle and sleep. You’re definitely going in the right direction, but in order to really solve these problems and get him sleeping straight through, you have really got to completely break any connection he has between the bottle and sleep. So be sure to keep him wide awake through the bottle at bedtime, even if you have to tickle him or softly poke him a little. Talk to him and if you need to, take the bottle out to dance him around a little and try again. It is important that he have some food before bed but you really do not want him to start his journey to sleep at all, with that bottle.
Reading a story after the bottle, helps in breaking that association a little bit more as well. If he does not seem terribly keen on the story, just do a page or two and be done with it. He must be going into the crib awake. It might mean though, that for a little while bedtime does not go as smoothly as it has been with him going down drowsy, rolling over and falling asleep. It might also mean that he does a bit more crying at bedtime but keep in mind that he is figuring out “How do I do this all on my own without the help of the bottle?”
You can handle the next step in a couple of ways. You can stay in the room and sit by the crib for a couple of nights and then you move a little farther away for a couple. Finally move over to the door for the next couple and continue to work your way out of the room. That might make it a little easier on both of you.
Alternatively, you could just leave and check on him every few minutes to reassure him you are near. It should just take a few nights because you have already started him in the right direction, rather than endless nights of continual going in and checking.
It should not really take you much more than a couple of nights, and that skill should start transferring to his middle-of-the night-waking too. It will happen automatically, but I do suggest that you handle every night waking exactly the same. This prevents any confusion for Oley, because he then will then recognize that there really is no chance that he might if eat, if he just protests long enough.
So for every wake up, first wait a couple of minutes and see if he can get himself back to sleep without any help from you. If it continues past five or ten minutes then a parent should go in to offer some support. You can do this with careful touching, key phrases, and a few reassuring words that everything is fine. Then either continue with the leave and check style method or perhaps stay if you want and be with him through the time that takes him to get back to sleep.
He is going to have to go back to sleep on his own, with no feeds. Also I would not consider morning, anything before 6AM meaning I would consider it a night waking if it is 5AM. Hang in there until at least 6, so that he starts to realize that morning comes a little bit later. That should solve the problem of the soaked through diaper, they should be much drier in the mornings.
One other problem area you mentioned having was the wake up occurring an hour into sleep. You should consider that a night waking as well, and follow your same steps. If he has a bottle before bed, then that waking cannot be for food so you don’t have to worry about him being hungry. It could just be a bit of a habit he has gotten himself into. Just treat it like a night waking and do exactly what you would do if it was 3AM; wait a little and then “leave and check” or stay with him until he is back to sleep, without the bottles.
It really does sound like the bottle is the issue. Just make a few changes with that in mind and it will help him to find his own ways of falling asleep that are much more independent. Learning to not rely on the bottle at all, when it comes to sleep will help get him sleeping through the night!
Thanks for your question Wendy; good luck and sleep well!
To learn more about The Sleep Sense Program, click here — or you can click here to order now!
To ask a question about your child’s sleep, just leave it in the ‘Comments’ section below! I’ll choose one and create a new video answer each week!
Jay goes to bed at 7:00 every night after a bath, feed and story. He falls asleep half awake by himself in his crib. He is waking to feed at 10PM, 1 am and 4 am and gets up consistently at 6:30 everyday. Jay is only 4 months old, and breast fed but I am concerned that he is getting up habitually rather than out of hunger and this setting him up for bad sleep habits. If I try to get him back to sleep he cry’s violently to the point where I have to rock him just to calm him. I still don’t feed him after getting him back to sleep he wakes up an hour later still wanting to eat. Needless to say I stick to his 3 wake ups each night because anything else is to traumatic. When should I start weaning him off the night time feedings?
My 8 month old baby boy Conor had just started sleeping right through the night (from 7pm to 7 am). Then he picked up a cold a couple of weeks ago which knocked him out of his routine, then the clocks here in the UK went back for Winter. This has resulted in Conor waking up at 5am (presumably because his body clock thinks its 6am). The last few nights it was 3am & 4am, we tried everything to reassure him, (waiting first to see if he could get himself over, patting/shusshing him etc). Nothing works except giving him a bottle. We dont give him a full bottle just a bottle with two or three scoops in the hope that he will eventually give up on waking up. The sleepness nights are really starting to toll on me & my husband especially as my husband has to get up for work. Can you provide any advice? Thanks.
Hi Dana,
I bought your Sleep Sense program some months ago and have used it several times with success most times.
However due to illness, my daughter (now 11.5months old) has had disrupted sleep, so I am now using the “Stay In the Room” method as a refresher for her. I have always used the “leave and check” method in the past. I have found the stay-in-the-room has less tears for her :)
For the first 3 nights of this method, she slept through from 8pm till 6.45am. She woke once each night sitting up crying because of a bad dream but returned to sleep immediately once I lay her back down.
However for the last 2 nights, she has woken up once during the night because of a bad dream around 11pm, and then again at 4.45am. At this time, I go in quickly as the program advises to get her back to sleep but she seems wide awake and calm. So I have tried to sleep in the room with her but she simply tries to interact with me even though I ignore her. So I change her nappy, give her a drink of water which she drinks heartily, and then I try to put her back to bed. Sometimes there are a lot of tears when I leave the room, it doesnt work. All this usually takes 1 hour itself. She then sleeps by 5.45am/6am for 1 more hour to about 6.45am.
I know she is not ready to start the day at 4.45am as even though she is awake, she is quiet. How do I get her to sleep through this 4.45am wakening and go through to 6.45am.
Should I give her a bottle at 5am and get her back to sleep quickly? She eats a good dinner but doesnt drink much milk before bed, she only takes around 90ml-120ml.
Please help! My husband and I are sooooo tired. She turns 1 year old next week and I just dont know when this will settle. She (and we) has only had 6 weeks in total of good night sleeps in all this time (disrupted due to illness or teething).
Thanks so much Dana,
Tanya
hi dana,
I live a 5 month 1/2 baby her name is alondra.She goes to aleep around 7 o 8 pm but she has to have a bottle in order to go to sleep and absolutly no noise!then she wakes up every 2 hours to eat and by 5 am its her waking time…if i dnt put the bottle in her mouth shell cry and cry ….until i feed her.This is really fustraeting for me and my husband..I wish she could at least sleep 4 hour straight but i think thats imposible..we try the swing and she does goes to sleep once she have ate 3 ounces on milk of curse if not she crying will continue and continue…I dnt know if im feeding her too less because i give her 4 ounce every 2 hours.I try more some days..some times she eats it and some times she doesnt..help me pleaseeeeee
My baby is three months old and does not yet sleep through the night (althugh she has done it a couple of times seemingly by accident). The doctor has told us that she is now big enough to sleep through.
For the last couple of weeks she has been waking once at night but only taking 10-20mls of milk. She is fed at 10 and normally takes around 240mls and goes to sleep at around 11.30.
I feel sure she is not hungry and is just unable to get herself off to sleep once she has woken; however, she wil be wide awake shouting and flapping her hands around so that no amount of comforting from me will make her sleep again. We’ve tried leaving her for 10 minutes to try to see if she will go back to sleep but she just becomes more and more upset. Last night she did this at 2.15am after taking a 240ml bottle and going to sleep at 11.15.
It is very frustrating because I know that she can sleep through. I don’t know whether the fact that she it taking such a small amount of milk is a good sign or whether I am getting her into a bad habit by using this method to get her back off to sleep.
Help!
Thank you,
Emma
Hi Dana.
We have a 5 month old son. He seems to be only able to fall asleep in the day during a bottle. However, at night we have a robust routine where he has dinner, a bath, pj’s, 10 mins of cuddles from Daddy, bottle then bed. He is 90% of the time put to bed wide awake and goes to sleep by himself with no problems or crying.
However, he is starting to wake during the night and won’t settle by himself. It is only once a night, but can be any time from midnight to 5am.
He has never slept with us (I made that mistake with my oldest boy!). We are also weaning him – and I make sure he is full at dinner and try to encourage him to have a whole bottle before bed.
I know that it is the bottle that’s causing issues. But it’s weird that going to bed he is fine and settles with no problems but won’t settle in the night, or during the day without a feed. I have tried dummies and leaving him to cry. When left to cry, he cries for hours! I am now trying to stop the bottle completely and use sippy cups.
Please help, he’s miserable without his daytime naps and making us all exhausted with his night time waking. I’m just hoping he doesn’t start waking even more at night, as I’m due to return to work in 3 months time!
Any help is gladly appreciated. Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Dana
I just joined your website and received your email about your free blog comments. I plan on ordering your book which I am really excited about. I just viewed this video segment and I have the same problem but with nursing except for I can no longer do the soft touch and phrases as he sits up or stands up in his crib crying. I am struggling with this because I have tried the strategies and the only way to calm him is to feed him which I know is an association but I am at a loss?? I hope you can give me some suggestions.
I have an 8th month old Jayda and she will not go to sleep before 12 am i give her a bottle before she goes to sleep but she will wake up in 3 to 4 hours for another one and it goes on through the night at least 2 to 3 times if i dont give her a bottle she wakes up and wont go back to sleep for another hour but she wakes up in the morning around 10 or 11 always around in there.
Our 7months old Charlie wakes at 4am for a bottle and gos back to sleep with us only,We have charlie in bed at 8pm bath,oils then p.j and bottle,sometimes pudding,it takes sometime before he gos to sleep,how can we stop that night feed,He drinks the whole bottle,then wake at 6.30am again and has a bottle at 7.30 about 100mls.thanks Teresa.
Hi Dana, We have a 3 1/2 month old daughter named Avery. Avery was colicy from 2weeks to 10weeks, as a result we held her often. Around 7weeks Avery would go to bed around 8pm and sleep until 3am wake for a feeding and then back to sleep until 7pm however this changed around the 10week mark. At 10 weeks we began putting her to bed awake after a bedtime routine of a massage. Avery is breast fed and usually eats between 6-6:30pm then has her massage and then off to bed at 7:30pm. The problem we are having is that she wakes several times in the night for feedings often at 10pm, 1:30pm, 4pm and then is up around 6:15am. We have tried to let Avery cry it out for the 1:30 feeding which resulted in her staying awake for an hour and fussing only to wake an hour later to cry again. That was an improvement however she has gone back to crying when she is not fed. Therefore I wonder is she too young to be sleeping through the night, is she actually hungry (because she does take in a full feeding),is this a habit, is she going through a growth spurt and needs the food. On another note Avery only has very short naps during the day…she is a wake for 1.5hours the naps for 40 min and will not go back to sleep…so much for the concept of sleeping while your child sleeps:)
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Sincerely,
Laura and Avery…both who are in need of some GOOD sleep
Dear Dana, Thanks firstly for all the advice in the blogs, it’s really helpful! I was wondering if you have ever come across sleep problems / issues in babies / children with club feet. I have a 10 month old, Jack, who until about 6 – 7 months would sleep through the night (i.e. 12 hours without a feed). He is breastfed and is a very big eater of solids. He has great day sleeps (1.5 hours am and 2 hours pm) but in the last 2-3 months has been waking a few times a night. Of late, these wakings have been up to 2 hours of awake time, not always upset but mostly he wakes crying and will not settle until I go in. He falls happily asleep on his own at bedtime – dinner at 5:30pm, bath at 6:00pm, breastfeed at 6.30pm and in bed at 7pm (or thereabouts – sometimes the breastfeed is closer to bedtime ~ 10min or so). Then we go in and put his boots and bar on (he has a left club foot) and into bed with his “snuggle” (a muslin wrap). I am at my wits end as he used to be SOOO good at putting himself back to sleep and now isn’t. Am wondering if our interstate move 8 weeks ago may have contributed but not sure (even if it did) how to change it! The only silver lining in all of this is that our 4 year old daughter sleeps VERY soundly through all of this!
Thanks
Sue-Ann
Hi Dana,
I have a 10 month 2 week old daughter, who was sleeping so well on her own for about 3 months. Our night time rountine has not changed, we feed, give her a bath, PJ’s, a little play time, Books, then Bed. We have been putting her down awake and she would fuss for a few minutes then put herself to sleep. Now, following the same rountine, she will put herself to sleep, but will wake in the night anywhere around 3am – 4am. We will let her cry it out for about 5 – 10 mins to see if she will go back to sleep on her own, but it rarely ever happens. One of us will get up with her, she will eat anywhere from 2oz. – 4ozs of bottle (formula), then go back to bed until we wake her in the morning (around 7am) to head out the door for Daycare/work. Am I doing something wrong? Is there something better I can do?
Any advice is good advice.
Thanks!
Hi Dana
Our 4month old son, Arya, used to have colics during which he had to be rocked in our arms or swing to be calmed. Now that is phase is over. But now he cannot sleep by himself! We follow a routine starting around 7:30 pm consisting of warm sponge, lotion massage, diaper change and feed (through which he generally cries protesting) and after his feed (I’m still exclusively breastfeeding) he is half awake. Around 8 he is asleep and sleeps generally for 2-3 hrs well. Rest of the night he keeps waking by stifling sometimes needing rocking sometimes feeding. We allowed him time to settle by himself only to rouse him to crying out loudly unless either rocked or fed. We tried Ferber method with white noise with failure. I have to keep getting up throughout the night and rock and feed him and get up at 4 in the morning when he won’t sleep anymore. I’m dog tired. Plea….se help !!!!
Hi Dana,
10 weeks ago we were blessed with the arrival of our second child, Max. I’ve been working extremely hard to achieve some healthy early sleep habits from what I learned/can remember from my experience with our daughter, now 2.5 years. She was always a great sleeper with the exception of a period of time when she would wake from her naps every 45 minutes. I remember watching the clock and waiting outside her room so that when she started to stir I would be there to stick her soother back in her mouth or pat her bum until she transitioned back to sleep. So far, we start Max’s bedtime routine around 7:15 which includes a bath, massage, nursing and to bed sleepy but awake between 7:45 and 8:30 depending on when he settles. He will then sleep until between 2:30-4:00 am for a feeding and then right back to sleep before his next feeding between 6:30-7:30 am. During the day we try to stick to a 2.5-3 hour schedule where he is awake for approx 1 hour for feeding/changing/playtime before he goes down for a nap which he does very well for the first 45 minutes. If I leave him to get through this on his own, he will completely wake himself up into a full cry and then I am unable to get him to go back to sleep. I can sometimes catch it in time to help him transition by changing his position or with a soother but not consistently. What advice do you have to help kick the 45 minute intruder to the curb and is a 10 week old baby to young to let cry for any period of time??
Thank you in advance,
Theressa
I have 3 months+2 weeks daughter…she was used to rocking in my hands before goin to sleep..so the whole day i was too tired rocking her again and again…but now i have changed her habit of rocking and put her in her seat (rocking seat) and do v little rocking so she goes to sleep..but i want to change her habit and want her to sleep her on own and on her cot..but she is used to her seat…what can i do?
and her nap timings are greatly disturbed..sometimes she just nap for half hour gets up again and then it goes the same the whole day…..at night i try to put her to sleep by bathing massagin etc…..she sleeps very well for one hour then again she is up without any reason….doesnt wants a feed..etc
at night she wants bottle after two hourss..she just takes less then ounce and goes to sleep..she has not any association with bottle .Help!
Hi Dana
My son Jake is 16 months old. Since be has been a baby he is not a good sleeper. He does not sleep much during a day and his extremely active. He goes to bed okay and goes to sleep on his own. The problem is when he wakes he sits or stands up and screams. If you lay him back down he goes back off to sleep. My local health vistor suggested giving him a pillow and pordridge before bedtime, this has helped and he does not wake as often. I think he has got into a habbit now of waking up. How can I change this? or do i need to wait till he grows out of it, but when would this be. What i would love more than ever is a full nights sleep without been woken up! (16 months is a long time to go with out sleep) Help
dear Dana:
MY son richard is 23 months old and still not sleeping through the night. He’s home with dad all day. and sleeps until 6:30P.m. Then
he will stay up no nap until 5:00a.m. help!! i get no sleep have to be in work 8:00a.m.
I have a 2 year old and a 1 year old. My 2 year
old relies on a bottle at 8:00 when she goes to bed and another when she wakes up in the middle of the night. When she is done on her last bottle, we dont give her any more but then she sart waking up another two to three times asking for us. Since she was little my husband and I always put her to bed, not only does she rely on a botlle but she also relies on us to put her back to bed. My husband and I have tried many times just to let her cry but it breaks my heart, so we just deal with it and put her to bed but it gets very tireing after a while. I get around maybe five sometimes four hours of sleep. Please help me !!!
My daughter Marrella goes to sleep at around 8:00 every night by me holding her for about 5 mins then goes down easily. But my problem is, is that she wakes up at around 12:00 because she lost her pacifier then goes down quickely again until another hour or two passes that she wakes up again because she lost her pacifier. I wake up about 5-6 times a night. What do I do?
Our baby is now 9 months and a total joy despite being sleep deprived. She used to sleep through the night in her crib when she was very small – around 3/4 months. After an infection – I began to breast feed her lying in our family bed and often she would fall asleep after feeding both for naps and when she woke in the middle of the night. During her night feeds, I would wait until she was totally asleep and bring her back to her crib where she would wake several hours later and come back to our bed for a feeding.
At about 6 months she began to refuse the crib for naps and for night sleeping – no amount of bedtime routine, warming the bed, heating/cooling the room, mobile, toy/prop would settle her. She was sleeping in the family bed all night and waking at least 2 or 3 times a night for a light feed or to have me put her back to sleep. Subsequently, I am developing back and shoulder problems due to the position I spend most of the night sleeping in and I am non-functional for large parts of the day due to being over tired.
At 7 and 8 months we tried on two separate occasions to cry it out using the Feber method. She cried for 4 hours each night which went on for over a week. She also vomited twice – which was awful. The only way she will go down at night is by being walked and rocked around in the basement for over 45min and then transferred to our bed when we go to sleep. For naps, I have to rock/walk her for about 30 min until she goes down and then I have to lie next to her for hours on end trying to keep her asleep. If that doesn’t work – I will take her for a walk in the stroller. This week alone I have walked over 15k.
In 9 months – we haven’t had a night on our own (not even in the house) because we can’t leave her with anyone as she won’t go down in a crib. We are frustrated and irritable with each other because we are so tired. Daycare is fast approaching where they are expecting that she will be able to nap in a crib. Do you have any advice for us to transition her to her own crib and room that might meet with some success? We are desperate.
Dear Dana,
I need help with my 11 month old baby. He is not sleeping through the night. And the worst part is – when he is awake it takes him more than hour to fall asleep: doesn’t matter if I take him to our bed or he stays in his bed.
Right now is 3.15am and he is awake from 2 am. Still can’t settle down. He woke, started crying and we waited to see if he falls asleep on his own. He did not so I took him into our bed. But he started tossing and climbing and even crying. Nothing made him happy. Eventually I rocked him for 5 min and put him back to his bed. He stood up in his bed and cried for ½ min, then lie down and seemed like was falling asleep. 5 min later I wanted to cover him with blanket. He woke up and started crying. I lied him down, covered and left him in his bed. He cried ½ min and lied down. But I could hear he was not sleeping. In 5-10 min he would be up standing and crying for a little and when lying down and trying to fall asleep. He would not toss, lay still but repeat the same crying every 5-10 or 15 min.
You will ask about our routine at night. We get in pajamas, he sits on my laps and drinks his bottle, while I read him a story, and he touches the book. Usually after his is done with bottle he gets pacifier and I try to continue with book. Seldom he is interested in it. So we get up, turn night light off and I rock him and sing a song. When he is sleepy (after 5, sometimes 10 min) I put him into his bed and leave. He cries a little (recently just few minutes) and falls asleep. His bed time is 7.30-8pm. He wakes sometimes between 8 and 11.30pm but falls asleep without our help. But later…. about 12am he is standing up in his bed and crying. Maybe we wait too short but eventually he would end up in our bed. He used to fall asleep right away. But last week it wasn’t the case. He would toss for an hour in order to fall asleep. When he wakes again at 2am and same scenario repeats and when again at 4-5am. This last wake up kills me the most as 6am is when I get up, and not every time we succeed in falling asleep at 5am.
We have no routine for day naps…. I am not sure how he falls asleep in daycare, but he gets good nap time there. On weekends I struggle with him. First we get up later, so he is no longer on daycare schedule. Second I have to rock him to full sleep in order to put him into the bed.
I can find a lot of articles / books about nighttime waking and how to deal with it but not much how to deal with naps. Leaving him in his bed crying would not work as he never looks tired enough to give up.
By the way he never slept through the night until we had to try “let him cry “technique when he was 9 month old. It took 20 min of crying in order to fall asleep. But later I had adjusted routine and added rocking to partially asleep stage as mother in law was helping us with the baby and she could not listen to the baby’s cry in the evenings. I tried to explain her that baby would wake up every 2 hours, but now he sleeps through the night after crying those 20 min in the evening. She could not understand it. That’s how baby ended up in daycare and got sick and after month of nice sleep we were back to zero and dealing with new problems.
3.30 am – it looks like he is asleep. I am afraid to put blanket on and wake him up.
Thank you
Hello Dana,
Daniela is 5 moths old, she sleeps from 7 pm (after shower and feed) throughu the night until 6 am, but now almost every night she wakes up at 2 and at 4 am because she doesn’t know how to soothe herself; sometimes is because she dropped the soother or because she looses her hands from the blanket and gets distracted with them; what can we do to help her soothe herself?
My daughter Emily had a bad ear infection a few weeks ago. I held her over night to sleep in our recliner because her congestion was so bad and she felt terrible. She is almost 5 monthes old. She had been sleeping through the night 8 to 10 hours. I usually held her in the afternoon for an hour nap and she caught shorter naps here and there. Since I held her so much the week that she was really sick she has decided that she prefers that. She’ll scream for an hour because my husband is holding her and she wants me to hold her to nap. I nurse her but it doesn’t seem like that is how she goes to sleep. She fusses and I rock her. I let her cry for an hour the other night in her crib. I knew she was tired. When I would leave and check on her that fueled her crying even more. So, I gave in and walked and rocked her. She was asleep in 3 minutes and I put her down and she stayed asleep but woke several times in the night. How do I teach her to fall asleep in her own crib and how long do I let her cry? Can I hold her during the day when she naps or is that confusing her? I like that cuddle time.
My problem is that I have a very small 21 week old boy. He weighs 14.3kg and between the 2nd and 9th centile ie 91 – 98 children out of 100 are bigger than him. He rarely finishes all of his 210ml bottle leaving approx 30 – 50mls at each feed. he has 5 feeds from 7am, at 11am, 3pm and 7pm and then 10pm. As he is so small I feel that he needs to have a feed at night he wakes at 1am then 3am then 5am. I usually put his dummy back in at 1am and try not to feed him at 3am but if I do he finishes nearly the whole bottle so appears to need it.
How can I get him to drink more at each feed during the day so he can sleep longer during the night.
Thanks
Sarah Wellbelove
Alexa is 14 months, she is going to bed at 9.00 p.m. I cannot get her to sleep before that, she will cry and call for her sister or her dad. Since my husband have Anxiety everything is harder!. That is why I let her to be awake until 9.00. The problem now is that she wakes up at 1:00 a.m or 11:00 and she won’t go to bed until 4:00 a.m. She is been doing that for almost six days already. I am exausted luckily this was my spring break week. But I go back to college next monday. What can I do?. I tried to make her sleep in my bed but all she wants is to get out of the room and look for her sister.
My 10 month son wakes for water or a dummy at night.
My son is 10 months old now and is still waking once or twice a night for me to put a dummy in his mouth or to give him water. Once he has had his water he rolls over and go back to sleep. I have tried to let him cry but worry that he is thirsty and needs that water ? Should I leave him to cry ? how can i get him to sleep throughout the night.
Hi Dana, my son, Cole, is 13months. He has always woken up a lot during the night (to which I have just tried breast feeding him back to sleep) because I was so tired it seemed the easiest thing to do . I’m a solo mother, so I don’t have the support of a partner (without a milk supply) to help settle him without that temptation. . .
He has slept through the night on occasion so I know he can do it – but I understand I need to make some changes to the way he gets to sleep. He does associate the breast/milk with the journey of sleep.
I want to do it right, but have the problem that Cole is still in his cot, in my room – our house is old and is being renovated, and his room seems to be taking forever to finish.
I’m worried that if I try settle him while still in my room, then we will have to try all over again if/when he moves to his own room. And if he is settled finally, my entrance back into the room (for my bedtime) will disturb him. Or would it be more of a gradual step for him if he learnt how to sleep on his own in my room first?
Also – I usually leave the radio on quietly, and have a soft light on at night, so he doesn’t become frightened if he wakes during the night – but I’m not sure if this is confusing him more. . .
First of all I would like to know when bedtime should be for my 7 month old? I have been giving him a bedtime bottle at about nine or ten at night. Should I be putting him to bed earlier? Also He sleeps with us and he gets up every hour and a half. Sometimes he gets up a few times in twenty minute intervals. I breast feed him then to try to get him to sleep. I really want o stop the night feeds and I would like for him to sleep in his Crib. Even during the day when I put him down for a nap he will wake up twenty minutes later. I only have one bedroom that he has to share with his 2 year old sister, and I don;t want her waking up through the night while he screams. What should I do????
Oh…. I let him sleep with us because he sleeps longer than if I were to put him in the crib.
Hello Dana
My doughter Katherine is 18 months she has a nap everyday for 2 to 2 1/2 hours between 3pm to 6pm, but she goes to bed between 8 to 9pm she wakes at 1am and then 2 more times around 3 and 5am and finaly at 7or 8. But the real problem is that i stil breastfed until she falls back to sleep she does not like formula milk
and she screams and cry when i don’t breastfed her. I really wont to stop breastfeding what can I do.
We are having trouble with our son Jarrod who is 6 months.he rarely sleeps during the day,which is fine but he has started to really scream at night obviously because he is tired.
He goes to bed at 6.30 awake and usually nods off nicely but this past week he has gone to bed screaming,then when he falls asleep he wakes himself up,and starts screaming again.we are on day 5 of no sleep,and his record for screaming during the night now stands at 4 hours none stop.
it doesn’t matter what we do he won’t stop.
weve fed him,left him,done controlled crying,he’s hysterical if we pick him up or leave him.HELP!!!!!
WHAT CAN WE DO TO HELP HIM?
my problem is again about laiba .she is still waking up during the nite crying .,shes not settling for a good afew hours ,shes always wanting her bottle even though she has her soother.my other 2 kids are not getting there sleep because of this,im really nackerd and tired during the day.i try and give her a nap during the day but still nothing .her eating is fine ,drinking is good too,so i dont know what the problem is or wat im suppose to do.please can u help…………………………………………..
I have a difficult situation with my son Houston who is now 8 months old. He is already showing signs of being hyper and very strong willed. He has already learned to manipulate and I am fearful that if I don’t get this under control soon that we will be fighting this battle for many years to come. We have tried putting him to bed in the manner you have described but he screams so loud and so long that the neighbors start to call to see if he is okay. He will continue screaming until he is vomiting and we give in. He is waking 5 or 6 times during the night and on some of his wakings he wants a bottle. Then of course his wet diaper wakes him. Sometimes he wakes and wants to play. Can you give any suggestions on how to handle a baby with so much will to have it his way? Exhausted!
My daughter Vanessa is 2 months old. We have tried everything to let her sleep by herself in the crib but was not successful. To put her to sleep at night we have to breastfeed her and to carry and sway her. The moment we put her down on her crib she wakes up and cry. But if she sleeps in our bed she sleeps longer.
hi dana,
anjali is 14 months old still breast feeding she does not like any toddler formula ar normal milk it is hard during the day as she stays awake till evening and i cant put her to sleep though she has solids i think all babies need a bottle of milk i have tried different sipper cups and bottles but its always no it has been so hard as she doesnot get enough sleep and i am alway unawae wether she is tired, hungry or sleepy night is not a problem however though she still associates breast feeding with sleeping and i am finding that very hard to break she can cry for hours ????
thanks
nisha
Hi Dana
I have a question for you about our very active baby. I have been trying to encourage my 16 week old baby to have good sleep habits and we were starting to get him used to self soothing for his daytime naps and often when falling asleep at night (not crying himself to sleep which is a method I am not keen on). However, at 3.5 months he started rolling onto his front, we were excited by this early development but have now discovered that everytime we put him down to sleep when he’s not fed and fast asleep he rolls onto his front constantly and gets so frustrated that after 20/30mins of rolling him back he just isn’t sleepy anymore and I resort to feeding him asleep. We have tried sleeping bags (he’s worked out how to roll onto his front in them) and swaddling (he wriggles out of it immediately). What should we do? He is now so used to feeding to get to sleep that I’m waking up every 2-3 hours to feed him, help! I have also found that he has recently developed an aversion to going into his cot at night so it takes me at least an hour to get him down and lots of feeding/lying with him before he is so sound asleep that I can move him into the cot (if I try to early he cries as soon as he is placed in the cot even if he’s seemed to be fast asleep, is it wind?) – all our good work has gone, can we ever get him back on track???
Nic
my daughter Lilly-Ann is 11 months old. She sleeps well at night, about 12 hours. but in the daytime she doesn’t nap much. I’ve tried to put her into a routine, she wakes at 8am, then tried a nap at 11am and then one at 3pm, she just screams, sometimes it seems as though she just not tired. So now, i let her nap when she’s clearly tired or she just passes out in the car or i can just put her in the crib and she’ll sleep. she’ll sleep for 30 min – 1 hour per nap, she usually has two. when she wakes up, she’s happy and just wants to play. do i need to put her into a routine and how and when? thanx
MY DAUGHTER ISABEL IS 10MONTHS AND SHE CAN’T GO TO SLEEP AWAKE AND IF SHE DOES IS ONLY ON HER BOUNCER I DO THE WHOLE ROUTINE BAD, MILK RAED AND PRAY BUT IT’S NOT WORKING FOR ME AND THE WORST THING IS THAT SHE WAKES UP AT LEAST ONCE DURING THE NIGHT BUT GOES BACK TO SLEEP FEW MINUTES AFTER . I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP SPECIALLY NOW THAT I’M ALONE WITH HER SICE HER DAD GOT DEPLOY . THANK YOU
My daughter Kylee is almost 11 months old and I am hoping to stop breastfeeding around the time she is a year old. The only problem with that is that she needs to nurse to go to sleep. For naps and bedtime. What can I do to help her learn to get to sleep on her own. And also she will only nap if I keep hold of her the entire time. That is another problem I am having. Thankfully at night she will sleep in here crib just fine and sometimes only wakes up once if that. I would really appreciate any help that you could give me. Thank you!
Hi Dana,
Id love some help with my 31/2 month old baby girl. Since birth she has had problems sleeping and we have tried everything including attending a sleep clinic for 8 days and nothing seems to help.
Ashlyn has issues falling asleep and sleeping past 45minutes and this is day and night.
She is put in her cot with a dummy and sometimes a bit of a rock in the cot then left. Often she will go to sleep on her own but will always wake 45minutes on the dot later and no matter how tired she is she cant go back to sleep. This is now beginning to happen after 20minutes also and im running out of options and energy.
When she wakes i will comfort her in the cot and sometimes rock the cot and weve tried several settling techniques.
She also fusses at the bottle and will only drink 80ml-100ml at a time so im feeding her every 2 hours during the day and trying to string it out at night.
HELP what can we do.
Thanks
Rebecca
Hello Dana,
Tahlia is 7, months old and has been a very good night sleeper from birth.
she has her bath at 6pm bottle at 6.30pm then goes down fully awake at 7.pm and only waking for a bottle 1 or 2 times a night and going straight back to sleep without any help. I did manage to get her down to only 1 night bottle at around 2am and it was only 90ml. and she would wake around 8am.
However she has just started waking for a bottle between 12.30-1.30am which i give her only 90ml and then again around 5.30-6.30am i usually feed her again at this time 90ml and she will sleep till about 8.30am she then starts her day with her solid food. Her daytime bottles are usually every 4 hours from the wakeup one so about 3 a day and she also has 3 solids a day but she is not a very big eater or drinker.
She has also been stuggling to self settle after her night feeds which after about 15min i sometimes give her another 90ml of milk and she sometimes settles if she hasnt settled after going in and putting her dummy in a few times i bring her into our bed falls asleep in couple of minutes and then i put her straight back into her cot.
I know this is probably the worse thing to do by bringing her into our bed but i am so exhusted.
I assume she should be sleeping straight through the night by now but do i wait for her to start doing that on her own or is she past that stage?
She did sleep staight through one night last week from 7.30pm till 8.00 am but i tried doing everything the same the next day and have had no luck since.
How do i get Tahlia to sleep staight through the night?
Thankyou.
Hi Dana,
I have a 4 month old son who is teething like crazy and doesn’t like to nap. At night, he goes to bed awake after a bottle around 7pm and is asleep in about 5 minutes. He will sleep until about 4-5 and then have a bottle. He then sleeps until about 8. During the day, he is very active and alert but after 2 hours, he needs a nap. The only problem is, he only naps for 30-40 minutes at a time. He falls asleep on his own but won’t stay asleep. By 6pm he is exhausted because he doesn’t nap well.
Please help!!
I read your blog pretty much daily for ideas and has helped in the bedtime area but I need some help in the nap area.
thanks for all your help
Hi Dana,
I have a 5 month old who, up until about a month ago, would sleep from 8:00 pm until about 7 am. She requires a bottle to fall asleep, so we lie her down and give her a bottle until she falls asleep, then remove the bottle from her mouth. When she fusses, we put it back in. She rarely sleeps for a full nap during the day, usually what I call “cat naps” which range from 15 minutes to an hour. Now at night she falls asleep with a bottle around 7 pm, sometimes earlier, wakes anywhere between 10pm and midnight for a bottle, then again around 4 am to 6 am. HELP!!! We are getting frustrated and the lack of sleep is taking its toll on my whole family. Please help us.
Hello Dana,
I have just watched the video about 9 month old Oli, who wakes up for a bottle at night. It was very helpfull for me as I also need to brake the habit of “beeing fed to sleep”. My daughter Erika is 4.5 months old and I am breast feeding her. She is usually half asleep when I put her to bed at 7 pm. She then sleeps till 11 pm and then wakes up about every 2 hours. I feed her every time. I am 100% sure I have created a bad habit and I am very ready to brake it. I just want to check with you if she is ready to sleep through the night at her age and that she is really not hungry when she wakes up. She feeds every two hours during the day, so I am not sure if she is also hungry every 2 hours at night. Thank you
hi i was hoping you could give me some advise my baby boy is nearly one and i would like to stop breastfeeding him i have cut all feeds out during the day slowly over the past few months but now its the night feeds that need to go as i am knackered for work in the mornings as wakes several times in night and i know he associates being breastfed with sleep i would like some help on how to stop breastfeeding whether to stop completely or slowly many thanks x
Hi Dana,
I am having a lot of trouble with naptime. My daughter, Aunica, is 8 months old. She slept in my bed until she was 6 months. When I finally put her in her crib it only took 2 nights and she was sleeping through the night. The problem is that when I put her down in her crib in the daytime she screams like a banshee. Sometimes she will sleep for a half hour and then she is screaming again. I keep her naptime routine the same as her bedtime routine except for the bath. I have hung room darkening blinds (though now that the days are getting longer I’ve realized it isn’t the light because she goes to bed at night when it is still light out). She wakes up at 7:30am and I try to put her down at 10-10:30am then I try again at 1-2pm and she goes to bed at night at 7pm. I am always watching for signs of sleepiness but nothing is helping. Thanks for your consideration.
Hi Dana,
My son Jaxson is 6 months old and is waking 2-3 times a night. If i leave him to cry it out for 5 to 10 min he sometimes will go back to sleep however he will be on his stomach. He rolls over and cry’s out for me knowing that i will come and roll him over onto his back and then i know he has no chance of falling asleep on his own after that. i’m not comfotable leaving him on his stomach to sleep…any suggestions would be great!
Dana, I just read about Ollie, the 9 month who doesn’t sleep through the night. I have a grandson, Kylan, who lives with us along with his mother. He is 13 months and has slept through the night about a hand full of nights. I would like to purchase your program, but my daughte isn’t convinced it will work. She tried a similar way at a doctors advice, but got frustrated. Kylan goes to sleep with a bottle and pacifier. He wakes up 2 times a night. When you try to lay him down awake, he screams for a long time. He will do the same thing in the night without a bottle. She has tried for 1 1/2 hours to get him to sleep in the middle of the night, but has to give in to get some rest herself. Kylan is a very healthy looking boy. He doesn’t eat enough solid food in my opinion, but it’s not because he doesn’t like food. He’ll eat a few bites, then refuse. I think there might be an association there, but am told he’ll eat when he’s hungry. We’re all losing a lot of sleep and need answers. Any suggestions?
Hello. I have a question about my youngest, he is2weeks old and wanted to know what I should do for a bedtime routine at night and during the night. I am nursing and he won’t lay in his crib, only likes to sleep with me. Help. Sleep deprived.
Dear Dana ,
It really does make sense everything you said …but i wish it’s that easy to apply to my little Jared who wakes up almost every hour at night after being put to bed at 9 pm . he would sleep 2 to 3 hours then after that will wake up every hour after … i have to pick him up every time he wakes up othetrwise he will start crying then coughing up then will throw up because he’s got GERD . so basicly he fall asleep in arms in an upright for 30 mins . before i put him to crib . i wish i could put him to bed awake until he fall asleep … i don’t really know what to do … i get so frustrated & don’t really get any sleep myself . Please help me … i’m tired of this coughing up then throwing up after …
My daughter is 4 months old and I am breatfeeding. She wakes up every half hour in the night for a feed. I know that breast milk digests fast but isn’t this a little too much? I have not slept for more than 2 hours in the night and I am exhausted. She has problems getting to sleep and falls asleep on the breast. I have tried the ‘cry it out’ method but she just kept crying for more than 2 hours. In the end my husband ended up rocking her to sleep which is the other method she falls asleep with. My husband and I argue all the time about how to get her to sleep. Please advise. Thank you.
Hi Dana
My son Jared will be 4 months in about 2 weeks. He is a relatively good sleeper, bed time between 6 and 7 with no problem waking up between 12 and 2 for a bottle and then waking again between 6 and 7. The problem is that I have been giving him a bottle now at bedtime, he still wakes between 12 and 2 but now he wakes up between 5 and 5:30. Another thing is that he uses a pacifier but when it falls out I have to go and put it back in, for him to fall asleep, how can I change this.Another thing is after his feed between 12 and 2 he seems to be restless the rest of the night, what could be the cause of this?
Hi Dana, We’re almost there with our five month old in terms of having him sleep through the night. He gets a bath at 8pm, nurses and then falls asleep between 8:30 and 9pm on his own.
The only issue now is that he wakes up between 4:30 and 5:00am and refuses to fall back asleep. I’ve tried helping him to grab his blanket and rub his face (which he usually does before falling asleep) but he just continues to cry. My goal is to have him sleep until at least 6:30am. Any tips?
Hi dana,
I have a 9 month old boy,Logan. He is on a really good bedtime routine. He gets a bath at 7:30pm, cereal and a bottle at 8pm, a story and then off to bed by 8:30pm. He wakes at around 8am, naps for about an hour at 10:30am and again around 2:30pm. He was sleeping through the night really well, maybe waking up twice but he would sooth himself back to sleep. we have recently moved and are sharing a room with him temp and now he is waking up several times through the night. He also has learned to pull himself up in the crib and now he won’t lay down. I know it’s not a good idea but the only way he will lay down and go to sleep is if i bring him over to my bed to settle him down and then i put him into his own crib. But now he is throwing a temper tantrum every time i put him back in his crib. This is lasting for about 2 hours or more. We have tried letting him cry it out and check on him every few minutes but he seems to get louder and more upset and is waking everyone else up in the house. I don’t know what to do. Please help me
Dear Dana,
I really enjoy your blog! Thank you!
Topic: Silent Reflux and Sleep Training
I have an 8-month old son who is a very poor napper. He has been having silent reflux and although I breastfeed him and try to leave him half an hour upright before putting him down, he always has a reflux or gas before going to sleep. I tried to sleep train using the cry it out method at 4 months old but have stopped since because of his reflux. I try to take all gases out and in the process he falls asleep.
At night he usually falls asleep while breastfeeding around 7 pm. He has a routine: bath, pjs, cereal, prayer and breastfeeding, but falls asleep either while eating or rocked since he has so many gases and reflux. I tried to let him cry it out and he is too hysteric, and usually has a lot of reflux afterwards.
He sometimes wakes up with reflux half an hour or one hour after being put down, and once he burps he sleeps until 4-6 am. Other times he sleeps from 7 pm till 1 am when he has gas or reflux, and once I help him with them he goes right back to sleep without nursing. He now nurses only once a night around 4-6 am, after which he sleeps for 1-2 hours more. He has always slept pretty well at night.
Naps are a different story. I try to put him down for naps every 2 – 2 hours and a half after he wakes up. After I rock him to sleep because of so many burps, I put him in the crib but he usually wakes up half an hour after. At that time I go to him and after he burps I sometimes make him sleep 40 minutes to 1 hour more. However, it takes 10-30 minutes to make him go back to sleep again. I am tired of making him sleep and want him to sleep on his own. Occasionally I tried to let him sleep by himself, but he can cry 30-40 minutes. I could not leave him longer. And he does not fall asleep alone. He usually takes 3 naps a day around 9, 1 and 4 pm, each nap averaging 30 minutes.
My question is if the reflux really wakes him up or if it is all right for me to let him cry out both for naps and at night… I just want to know whether he is in pain or he has just gotten used to waking up and being helped to go to sleep.
Can I use the cry it out method with my reflux baby? Will he learn to pass out the gas and continue sleeping alone or does he still need my help? He is not a crier usually (actually he is happy, eats well, friendly), unless something bothers him, that is why I want to know if it is pain that prevents him from falling asleep.
Thank you so much for your help with this.
Hi Dana,
I too have a similar problem to those making comments above. My daughter who is 16 months old, will not take a nap w/out being held. This is true for daycare and for home.
While night time is great – 90% of the time she goes right off to sleep, but nap is so completely different. Any suggestions on how to break this cycle?
Hello,
I have a 3 month old boy, Landin. He has always been bigger! At his 2 month check-up, he weighed in at 15 lbs!! His doc. told me that there is no reason why Landin isnt sleeping through the night since he weighs more than 11 lbs. Which Landin wakes atleast 2 times for a bottle. He usually sleeps about 4 hours the first stretch then 3 hours and then 2 hours. Going to bed around 7:30/8:00 and waking for the day at 6:30/7:00. The doc recommended that if he wakes at night, that I should let him cry it out! Im not sure if this is the right solution! I know he is metibolically able to sleep through the night, but he is only 3 months old.. What should I do? The doctor also said that he should be down to just 3 naps a day.. but I cant get him to stay awake for more than 1 1/2 hrs at a time without crankiness.. and he will only catnap unless I lay with him… If I lay with him he sleeps for 3 hrs. Any time Landin is put to bed, I put him to bed awake, and only go into him if he cries.. then I pat him and give him his binky… Any suggestions?
Thank you!!!
Hi Dana,
first of all, thank you so much for this wonderful support you give to tired moms! lol.
My daughter Phoebe is 7 mos old and breastfed. I started her on solids a couple months ago, and now she has about 4-5 breastfeedings and 3 solid food (pureed food) feedings a day. she has her last solid at dinner w/the family and then I breast feed her before bed and lay her down “milk drunk” lol.( I now know to lay her down more awake.) But my question is, she’s waking up 1-2 times per night, is she getting enough at this point to sustain her through the night, and is it ok for me to follow your advice above to let her cry for 5-10 minutes, and then check on her and lay her back down w/o feeding her. I ask because breastmilk isn’t as filling as formula.
thanks again for your support and encouragement to us moms :-)
hi
my baby marc he is one year old now sleeps from 7pm till 5 or 6 am,sometimes he wakes during the night which happens once every weel or so crying and standing in his bed,how do I know what he needs like milk which usually I DONT GIVE AT NIGHT OR TO CHANGE HIS DIPER? do you advice me to change his diper or not?
thanks for your helpful website
reem
Hi Dana,
I have a baby girl almost 4 months old and I am trying to get her into a nap and sleep routine but it is very hard as she was very colicy for a couple months and we did not know what to do so she got used to being held alot now it is so hard to get her to just entertain herself for more than 5 mins never mind even try to get her to sleep on her own. My son was so easy he fell asleep on his own but my little girl is making us go nuts. I hate to leave her to cry for so long but I am looking for any help in my situation as nothing is helping right now and she does not go to bed till 11-12am we are sooo tired in this house. please help any sugestions would be wonderfull. :o)
thanks
Hi Dana,
I have a 5 month old and she is waking 2-3 times a night. I put her to bed drowsy, but awake. I believe she is old enough and big enough to only need one night time feeding. My question is, how do I keep my 5 month old awake thru that one night time feeding. Or do you think she no longer needs a night time feeding?
I have a question regarding my 9 month old daughter Emma. She is exclusively breastfed and I have stopped nursing at night now. Here is my question, she will still wake usually one time at night and cry until I go up to her room. I do not pick her up but lay her back down, sometimes rub her back until she falls back to sleep. My question is will she learn to fall back to sleep on her own…..without my going into her room when she wakes?
Thank you so much for your time.
Deborah Kosinski
My son callum wakes up in the night, not for bolttes but he always wants to get in our bed. At bedtime i rock him with his boltte to sleep. then i will put him in his cot to sleep. my son will stay asleep tell 1 clock then he wants to get in bed with me. i cant get him back to sleep in his bed at night. i would like your help please.
Hi Dana,
I am puzzled by my 8mo old daughter. She used to sleep through the night or was able to put herself back to sleep. However, she is no longer doing so. I’m not sure what changed. We begin getting ready for bed at 7pm. She has a bath, gets into her pj’s, has a bottle, then we go downstairs and I read her a story. I then rock her for a few minutes and when she is calm I put her in her crib. I stand outside the door until she is asleep. Recently, she has begun waking up around 11pm and around 2am. She stands up in her crib and screams. Sometimes if I just lay her back down she will go back to sleep. Other times I rock her for awhile and then put her back down (awake). Last night I layed her down 3 times and she stood back up each time. Then I rocked her for a few minutes and layed her down; she stood back up and screamed again. I rocked her again, layed her down and then my husband and I had to stand outside our room until she went to sleep.
What else can I do?
Hi, Dana.
My daughter, Emerson, just turned 11 months. She sleeps through the night, 7pm to 7am, 90% of the time. However, on occasion and somewhat randomly either for one night or a couple in a row, she will wake in the middle of the night which I am sure is normal. The issue we run into, is she is not always easy to settle down and get back to sleep with out a bottle. Her ebdtime routine is to have a bottle and then read a story and she is going down awake and can put herself to sleep. Even after playing for a bit or walkinga round her crib, she will lay down and falla sleep, so i knwo she can do it. She also does cry out in the mdidle of the night and most of the time puts herself back to sleep (she does use a pacifier, so she finds one usually and settles back into sleep). But, occasionally she is into a good cry, we have left her, and I try to lay her back down several times, and sometimes get her to settle, but then she is back up and gets really worked up. To the point, I can not seem to settle her down and she gets more worked up – crying and pushing away, etc. almost in a tantrum. Those nights we usually end up breaking out a small bottle and seems to be the only way she calms, and then will go right back down. I know the bottle is not a good habit, but I just have not found another way. We do let her cry for few minutes, and we do keep laying her down, but she gets more and more frustrated and almost can’t settle back down. It isn’t a habit because only happens once in a while, but why can’t I just calm her down without it. Could she really be hungry? Any thoughts?
Well I have a similar problem with my almost 6 month old. He wakes up as often as every 20 minutes, and demands a nursing to get back to sleep. I’d love to let him “cry it out”. I’ve certainly tried, but he’ll go on and on for 4 hours!!! No amount of reassuring, or even walking, calms him down!! And the amount of time doesn’t get less the next night! It was the same with my first child. I was never able to get him to sleep through the night. He’s 3 now, and still wakes up at night, and has a terrible time going to bed at night. I am desperate not to let it happen with my second one, but this 4 hours thing is just too much! I’ve tried everything, and nothing works. All I know is that I’m completely exhausted, I haven’t slept a full night in over 3 yrs. Two days ago I ended up in the hospital because my body just quit on me, the night before I got only one hour of sleep. What do I do????
Our 22 month old son Charlie used to fall asleep within 20 min or so after putting him in the crib awake. He would soothe himself to sleep by repeating his “mantra” over and over again. “Maaaaa maaaaa maaaaa maaaaa etc.” About 2 months ago, he started babbling and talking more after lights out. Some of the time he gets very loud. He seems to do this for 40 to 60 min now before falling asleep and this is posing a problem for his 3 1/2 year old brother, Joey, who he shares a room with. In addition, Charlie rarely sleeps through the night. He usually wakes 2 – 3 times. He sometimes can soothe himself back to sleep when he does his mantra , but most of the time he wakes screaming. This also affects his older brother, not to mention mommy and daddy.
Our baby is two.
Unfortunately, we have developed a tight association between the bottle and sleep and between me, the father, and sleep. For the first two years, I fed the baby who suffered a lot with digestive and other problems, and put her to sleep, normally by feeding her with a bottle at that time as well as during the night.
We would like to ease the association between me and the baby and sleep since the mother is now well enough to join in (the mother was very sick earlier). We also are eager to end the bottle association as well as just get rid of the bottle all together.
We now only put water in the bottle so that is accomplished. The baby gets no bottles during the day, just at sleep time.
Thanks for your help,
Don
When i leave Dede at Daycare the seem to let him cry , because he doesnt want to put himself to sleep, he comes home with his little voice some what hoarse, is this bad?
My son Braidon is 17months. He goes to bed at 730 awake, lately its been taking him til 8 to fall asleep but he does it happily only crying for the first 5mins. Before bed he gets an 8 ounce bottle of milk, but he is still waking up 3-4 times at night wanting a bottle ( i will only give him water) I have to change him in the middle of the night and again since hes peed so much, and then hes up around 630am (he use to sleep in til 730-8) and is soaking wet again, hes still exhausted when he wakes up at 630 and i let him cry for 15mins+ and he still wont sleep more. What can i do to make him sleep threw the night and sleep in the morning. I also have a 4month old who sleeps better than him waking 2times at night.
Dede is 4months and 3 weeks and he only gets up for only one bottle each night sometimes none at all, he sleeps throughout the night and wakes around 4-4:30am, the only problem now i cant get him to sleep by himself he gets fussy and i have to give him the breast to get him to sleep in the day.
Hello,
My son too has suddenly started waking up. He is 9 months and has been sleeping from 6:30pm to 6am since he was 6 months old. Now suddenly he started getting up at 4am and then 2am and now 1am. He goes to bed awake and is able to put himself to sleep for both bed time and nap time. I wait for 30 minutes or so when he is up in the night to see if he can get himself to sleep, and once he starts to cry I go in to try to help him. Once I think he is settled I leave the room to have him really get upset, wake the whole house, and I am left to feed him. I am wondering, how do I discern the difference between habit and hunger. If he has been sleeping through the night for 6 months, how do I know that he is not hungry, or just forming a bad habit?
Hello Dana,
We are looking for assistance on trying to get our child to sleep and we are wondering if this plan will work for us.
We have a 19th month old who refuses to sleep in his crib. He started sleeping in his crib and through the night at about 5 months. We have a routine we follow every day. It’s bath, books, milk, brush teeth, pray and then crib. We had been following this routine for months and it was working great. On Daylight savings time change night, he just refused to go down.
We have tried letting him cry it out but it has not work. He is to the point where he can climb out of the crib and fall and hurt himself, so we have to be in the room. We can initially put him down and let him cry to sleep at about 8:00 pm, but last night he woke up at 2:40 am and cried until 4:00 am when we decided to bring him into our bed. He then fell asleep right away. We have heard that is a phase that most kids go through. How long does this last?
Not sure what to try at this point. I know brining him to our bed is probably making matters worst.
Thank you very much
Pablo